WWE Smackdown
August 25th, 2005

After reviewing WWE Summerslam '05 and Raw this week, I decided to keep the trend going. Who knows, maybe I'll be able to keep reviewing every show from now on. Wouldn't that be a kick in the ass? Now if only TNA will get their butts onto Spike TV, we'll have something! Anyhow, let's get to the action.

- The show stared, unsurprisingly enough, with a review of the Smackdown matches at Summerslam. That Batista Bomb of JBL on the steps looked even worse on replay, but since JBL's wrestling, I guess he's still got a spine attached.

- "Cowboy" Bob Orton came out to introduce his son, "The Legend Killer" Randy Orton. Funny note during Orton's entrance: someone in the crowd had a sign stating "Undertaker got scerwed". I would think 'screwed' would be a hard word to misspell, but hey, what do I know? Of course, the reason I noticed it is because WWE showed it twice. Spelling doesn't matter when it's getting the point across!

- Match #1: Randy Orton defeated Hardcore Holly with the RKO, after "Cowboy Bob" tripped Hardcore up, distracting him. Only a minute before, Holly nearly won by catching Orton with his great dropkick. I don't know. If you want to get Orton over as a mega-heel, do you want him nearly losing to Holly, and only winning because of his dad's interference? Just a thought. BTW, the crowd was huge into Holly.

- Palmer Cannon from "The Network" appeared in Teddy Long's office, talking about the move of Smackdown to Friday nights (*Death Toll rings in distance*). Cannon also says he wants JBL vs. Batista on the first Friday night show. This is just a crack against UPN, no less, no more. Could be interesting in the long run, though.

- Christian had Booker T & Sharmell as his guests on the Peep Show. Christian questioned Booker T about his problems with his wife, as well as his recent 'non-gold' phase, which Sharmell actually agreed with. She said that Booker T needed to stop worrying about her and think for himself. The Mexicools interrupted again, with Christian immediately attacking, only to get taken down by the numbers. But when Juvy accidentally shoved Sharmell, Booker became involved, helping Christian fight them off. Christian as a face? Potential.

- Match #2: Heidenreich won, via DQ, over Johnny Nitro, when Mercury used a chair. Both Tag Champs were taken out by MNM. Finally! An angle with the belts!

- Chris Benoit shows that he can make a cup of coffee in 25.5 seconds, the same time as he beat Orlando Jordan for the US Title. Gotta admit, it makes Benoit look like a strong champion, even if OJ's dying because of it.

- JBL complained about his back injury to OJ, and said that he needs OJ later on that night in their tag match for more than 25.5 seconds.

- Match #3: Super Crazy & Psychosis of the Mexicools beat Christian & Booker T when Christian left the ring, complaining about a bloody nose to Sharmell. As Booker T, tired, watched Christian head up the aisle, the Mexicools got him from behind and suplexed him, then got the cover to win the match. Sharmell seemed to be berating Booker again after the match was over, as Booker stared after Christian. So, uh, where is this going, exactly? How can Booker "get back to the gold" when he's feuding again with Christian?

- "Cowboy Bob" and Randy Orton give an interview backstage, touting the new Undertaker history DVD and offering a signed copy for charity (the Undertaker Retirement Fund). I'm still surprised the Dead Man hasn't appeared to kill Cowboy Bob yet. Maybe next show.

- Teddy Long said he had a surprise for Smackdown, with Cannon wanting to know what it was. But Teddy doesn't tell him. Go Teddy! Fight the power!

- Out in the ring, Long brings out the newest tradees, Christy Hemme and Stacy Keibler, for a Lingerie Pillowfight Match. But Cannon stops it, canceling the match since it didn't go with who the Network was trying to reach.

- Match #4: Ken Kennedy defeated Funaki with a nasty-looking fireman's carry flip off the second rope. Kennedy gave his own version of the introductions before the match, and I think he's got some potential. I really like that he's not a samurai/redneck/playboy/etc.

- Match #5: Chris Benoit, Rey Mysterio, & Batista defeated JBL, Orlando Jordan, & Eddie Guerrero. Of those 6 names, who doesn't belong in the main event? Sorry, couldn't help myself. Anyway, Batista won it by Batista Bombing OJ, after they had taken out both Eddie & JBL. The faces celebrated as the show ended.

Summary: Not a terrible show, but not near as good as I thought Raw was. I mean, you've got 4 championships, and you don't even have 1 defended coming off of a major PPV? Seems like shoddy planning. I also didn't see much of a build for anyone, not to mention hearing about any matches scheduled for next week. I tell you, I'm worried about Smackdown's future at this rate, because this is when they should have delivered.

Still, not all is lost. Batista and Chris Benoit make great champs. Just have them defend, that's all I ask. And, oh, I don't know, maybe rebuild the other two divisions? Please?

The Accelerator