Larry Csonka is one of the hardest working IWC columnists on the World Wide Web. He's currently the Co-Wrestling Editor for 411mania.com, my favorite wrestling news site, and regularly reviews television shows & pay-per-views from WWE and TNA, among others. I'm honored to report that Mr. Csonka has agreed to allow his PPV reviews to be displayed here at the Rollercoaster, to help continue to catalogue the history of professional wrestling. For more great reviews and columns, be sure to visit the site. You won't be disappointed.
411’s WWE Cyber Sunday Report 10.28.07|
Posted by Larry Csonka on 10.28.2007
Batista finally takes down the Undertaker and retains the World Title!
Remember to send your thoughts on the show. Include the MATCH and TRASH of the night, and score the PPV from 1-10!
WWE Cyber Sunday Begins Now!
-Live From Washington DC!
-Cole and JBL welcome us to the show.
-Todd Grisham is at the control center, and this first match will be a Stretcher Match with 40% of the vote.
STRETCHER MATCH: Finlay vs. Rey Mysterio
They circle and lock up, to a corner and then break. Finlay slaps Rey, slap back and Rey unloads with kicks and chops. Finlay single legs him and gets a choke. Finlay then tosses Rey to the steel post, delivers rights and then levels him with a clothesline. Finlay tosses Rey to the floor onto the stretcher. Rey rolls off and kicks Finlay in the head. Finlay slams Rey and then a gourd buster onto the stretcher. Finlay tries to toss Rey across the line on the stretcher, but Rey rolls off. Back into the ring and uppercuts by Finlay. Huge Finlay sucks chants, he is a great man. Rey gets a swank tilt a whirl head scissors. Rey tosses Finlay to the floor, kicks to the head and has control. Rey gets Finlay on the stretcher, but it rolls out from under Finlay. Finlay lays the boots to him, and then climbs for the SHACKALACKI that is on the pole. Rey attacks with kicks to stop that. Baseball slide to the nads of Finlay. Rey now climbs for the SHACKALACKI, Finlay grabs him and pulls him off the top. Finlay climbs but Rey attacks, they both go up and Rey gets a sunset flip powerbomb! Rey climbs again…and has it! Finlay crotches him and Rey falls to the floor. Finlay has the SHACKALACKI and beats on the knee of Rey. He gets the stretcher as Rey rolls into the ring. Baseball slide by Rey, tries a dive but is dropped onto the stretcher. Finlay pulls it towards the line, but knees by Rey. Finlay SLAMS Rey with the stretcher. Again into the face of Rey! Finlay just beats Rey down now but misses a stretcher shot. Rey now rams Finlay in the nads with the stretcher. 619 onto the stretcher! SENTON ONTO THE STRETCHER~! Rey pushes…but the stretcher gets caught on a cord. That sucks. They improv, Rey flapjacks Finlay onto the stretcher and then gets the win!
Winner: Rey Mysterio @ 9:55 ***
-There is speculation that Matt Hardy will not be able to compete tonight.
-We see Matt, who looks horrible. MVP arrives and asks how he is. MVP is disappointed as well, he says Matt got busted real bad. MVP says that he agrees that Matt shouldn't compete tonight. They are partners and friends, and if they went out there and Matt got opened up he could get some crazy brain damage or infection. MVP is sad, because he was ready to go. Matt says that's what Vicky said, and Matt heard MVP will still have a match. The rumor is that he will defend the US Title match tonight. Matt says he heard that it may be Mark Henry. Or Khali. Or Kane. MVP is not happy.
-JBL is in a referee shirt and says he will win the vote.
-There is new voting for MVP's opponent, one of the three monsters. Christi says it is NOT on the site yet to vote.
-We see Maria dressed like a cat. Victoria is a SUMO and Kenny is MR. FUJI~! Ron Simmons…DAMN. Glorious!
-Toss says that CM Punk will face…the Miz with 39%!
ECW TITLE MATCH: CM Punk © vs. The Miz
Lock up and a go behind and counters by both men. To their feet, Punk escapes a headlock into a top wristlock, takes Miz down and is in control. Off the ropes and a takedown by Punk and cover for 1. headlock takedown by Punk. They counter some and Punk takes him back down. A head scissors by Miz, escape by Punk and Miz nails him with a right. Off the ropes and a leg lariat by Punk. Chops by Punk, snap mare and kicks by Punk. Punk suplexes Miz into a sling shot suplex…SHADES OF TULLY for 2. Knees by Punk, snap mare by Miz and a leg drop follows. Miz goes up top…chops by Punk now. Up top and they fight, Miz drops down and sweeps the legs of Punk, who hits the mat hard. Miz covers for 2. Miz slams Punk to the corner, rights to Punk and then the corner clothesline by Miz and a cover for 2. Miz into an arm bar/half nelson. A "You Can't Wrestle Chant" for Miz. Punk escapes, back elbow and then a Cross body gets messed up and Miz about blows out his knee. Miz looks hurt. Over the ropes stun gun by Miz who is shaking off the stinger. Elbows by Miz, now into a chinlock. Y2J chants now. Punk elbows out, knees by Miz and then a suplex connects. Miz goes up top…Punk runs up and hip tosses Miz off the top! Forearms by Punk, off the ropes and a clothesline by Punk. Chops and a spin kick, kicks to the head and the running corner knee of doom followed by the bulldog. Springboard clothesline by Punk connects for 2. Punk calls for the end…grabs Miz and Miz counters and rolls up Punk, reversal for 2 by Punk. Miz misses the reality check, GTS and that is all.
Winner: CM Punk @ 8:50 via pin **
-They hype the ECW Monster Mash Match.
-Mickie James is a HOT Indian chick! Torrie is a football chick.
-JR and King finally welcome us to the show.
-We get a video package for the WWE Title match.
-Todd is with Regal. Regal says we will find out who faces Orton. The losers will have a match tonight. The man that will face Orton for the title is HBK with 59% of the vote.
NON-TITLE MATCH: Mr. Kennedy vs. Jeff Hardy ©
Jeff doesn't even have the title with him as he comes to the ring. Lock up and the crowd is INTO Hardy. Headlock takedown by Hardy, Kennedy tries to roll him and they go to the feet. To a corner, and a clean break. Lock up again, headlock by Kennedy. Into a hammerlock now. Hardy reverses it but Kennedy witches it again. Headlock by Hardy, up the ropes with the headlock takedown. To the feet, Hardy up the ropes again but Kennedy gets a backdrop suplex for 2. Headlock by Kennedy, off the ropes and a reversal by Hardy. Rights by Kennedy, he escapes and an Irish whip and Kennedy to the apron. Dropkick by Hardy and up top and a HIGH cross body to Kennedy. Back into the ring and Kennedy tosses Hardy to the floor. Hardy comes in and eats a boot to the head. Kennedy covers for 2. Neck vice by Kennedy, into a headlock now. Hardy elbows out, off the ropes and a DDT by Kennedy connects. Kennedy covers for 2. Neck vice by Kennedy again. He lays back and gets a half body scissors. To the feet, Hardy escapes and off the ropes…clothesline by Kennedy and a cover for 2. Kennedy to the 2nd rope…Hardy is up and nails him. Hardy up with him…RANA on Kennedy! The ref counts, they get to their feet and exchange rights. Kennedy off the ropes and a clothesline by Jeff. Chops to Kennedy, and another clothesline and Hardy covers for 2. TOF try by Hardy, countered and a whisper in the wind connects! Hardy covers for 2. Rights by Hardy, kicks by Kennedy and Hardy gets the reverse mule kick. Hardy goes for the corner dropkick, Kennedy moves and Hardy hits hard and Kennedy covers for the win.
Winner: Mr. Kennedy @ 9:00 via pin **
-JBL and Cole hype the show's concept and say we can still vote.
-Michele McCool is apparently "Eve." Melina is a hot showgirl.
-We see Mick Foley backstage playing with cut outs of Taker and Batista. JBL yells at him and says no one cares that he is back out of retirement to hype a book. JBL says he will show his propaganda video again. God that is great. Foley now says the biggest fat head in the arena is JBL. Foley says JBL is disgusting. Foley has the pedigree to be the special referee.
-Todd is at the control center with Vicky, and MVP's opponent will be…Kane with 67% of the vote.
US TITLE MATCH: MVP © vs. Kane
MVP to the floor to chill and warm up. MVP in and runs from Kane and then delivers rights. Off the ropes and a big boot by Kane. Corner clothesline by Kane, another and then a side slam follows for 2. Kane up top…MVP crotches him and nails the previously injured ribs of Kane. MVP lays the boots to the ribs, and then knees. More knees by MVP, he backs off and then gets the KAWADA BOOT to the corner for 2. MVP focuses on the ribs, seated abdominal stretch applied now. Kane elbows out and then MVP lays the kicks to the ribs. Kane single legs him and into the guard and beats on MVP. Knees to the ribs of MVP, knees standing by Kane and then a right to the ribs. Running kick by Kane and then he stands on MVP. Side back breaker by Kane connects. Abdominal stretch by Kane with rights to the ribs. He drops MVP down, and then lays the boots to him again. Kane runs MVP into the corner. Corner spears by Kane, another and he then puts MVP over the top and beats on him. Boot by Kane and MVP is hurting. Rights by Kane, pulls MVP to the post and slams the ribs on MVP into the post. MVP falls to the floor, the ref counts MVP looks to come in and falls to the floor.
Winner: Kane @ 6:45 via Count Out *
-Save_Us.X29. Please stand by.
-Layla is a bad cop. Kelly is a "gangsta."
-Edge Survivor Series Commercial runs.
-Orton is backstage and says be careful what you wish for because we may get it. He has done bad things to HBK, and we get a video package.
WWE TITLE MATCH: Randy Orton © vs. HBK
The show isn't "bad" thus far, but I think this is a situation where HBK has to have a great performance to help the show as a whole, which he has done many times. They circle a bit, lock up and around the ropes they go. To a corner and they break. Chops by HBK, Orton to the floor and an SENTON by HBK to the floor. He's in STEAL/SAVE the show mode. Back in, Orton kicks off and HBK with a single leg. Uppercuts by Orton, chops by HBK, drop toehold by Orton and into a front face lock. HBK to his feet, reverses into a hammerlock and tosses Orton to the steel post. HBK slams Orton shoulder first to the corner now, shoulder rams follow. Top wristlock by HBK slams Orton down. HBK lays the boots to Orton, Anderson hammerlock slam by HBK, and into a kimura variation. Orton fights to escape, rolls HBK and gets a 1 count. HBK pulls him back down. Orton rolls him again, gets a cover for 2. Orton steps on HBK's face, rights by Orton in the corner. Boots by HBK and back to the left arm. Hammerlock/backdrop suplex by HBK lands, very nice. Headlock takedown by HBK, Orton works for a head scissors but fails. Orton rolls, Orton kicks out and rights to HBK. Off the ropes and HBK tosses Orton to the floor. HBK to the floor and Orton BACKDROP suplexes him on the barrier! Back into the ring and Orton beats on HBK. He covers for 2. Hard Irish whip by Orton and HBK is down. Orton stomp now. HBK back with chops, rights by Orton and a swank dropkick by Orton gets 2. Headlock by Orton with the body scissors applied. HBK escapes to his knees and then feet. Rights to Orton, off the ropes and Orton MISSES a dropkick. HBK rolls him up for 2. Chops by HBK, rights by Orton. HBK counters a slam, Orton counters and then HBK counters a backdrop suplex for 2. 3.0 back breaker by Orton connects and HBK is down, Orton covers for 2. Orton stalks HBK, sets him up top. Rights by Orton, goes up with HBK and they fight…Orton knocked off. ELBOW DROP BY HBK MISSES~! Both men down and fighting to their feet. Orton up and stalks HBK for the RKO. RKO countered and a backslide gets 2! Chops by HBK again. Rights by Orton. Off the ropes and a forearm by HBK. KIP UP~! Atomic drop by HBK. Rights land. Slam by HBK. Up top…ELBOW DROP LANDS! TUNE UP THE CHRISTIAN ROCK BAND! Superkick misses and Orton LOW BLOWS him for the DQ FINISH. BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Winner: HBK @ 16:00 via DQ **˝
-Orton stares down HBK and has bad plans in store for HBK. Orton goes for the concussion kick and HBK gets sweet chin music.
-Brooke is Jane from Tarzan. Jillian is "Brittany" and drops babies on the floor.
-JR says this is the worst costume contest ever. I agree.
-Todd is back, HHH vs. Umaga will be a Street Fight with 57% of the vote.
STREET FIGHT: HHH vs. Umaga
HHH rushes Umaga during his entrance and we have a BRAWL~! They brawl up the entrance way and Umaga is just tossing HHH around. Pedigree try, escape and rights by HHH. Uppercut by Umaga and they start to go backstage to boo's. HHH spears Umaga through the set back into view. Rights by HHH but Umaga fights back, only to be slammed into the barrier. They fight into the crowd area and up into the stands. Umaga chokes HHH with cables, HHH escapes and tosses Umaga to ringside. Into the ring they go and rights by HHH. Uppercuts by Umaga and misses a corner splash. Rights by HHH, he rocks Umaga but he is still up. HHH goes to the floor and gets a trashcan. He levels Umaga with it. HHH covers for 2. HHH grabs the can and walks into a Samoan Drop (HE IS SAMOAN~!) Head butt to the ribs of HHH. More head butts by Umaga, and HHH is down. Ass drop by Umaga, followed by kicks to HHH. Off the ropes with a splash by Umaga and he gets 2. To the floor they go. Umaga slams HHH to the ring apron. HHH is then tossed into the ring steps and is down. Back into the ring and Umaga gets a leg drop and covers for 2. Shots to the ribs by Umaga, and then a right to the head and HHH is down. HHH fights back with rights, but Umaga nails the ribs and slows him down. A bear hug by Umaga now. HHH fights out with rights but Umaga gets a belly-to-belly suplex and HHH is down again. HHH down in a corner and rights by Umaga land. Umaga backs up…Samoan Clambake time CONNECTS! Umaga covers for 2. Another cover for 2. Umaga freaks out and scares the ref off. Umaga to the floor and has a chair. LOW BLOW by HHH. Low blow with the chair now! DDT on the chair by HHH! He covers for 2. Rights by HHH now, off the ropes and a knee buster by HHH. Boot, Pedigree try, but Umaga slams HHH to a corner. Boot by HHH nails a charging Umaga, but Umaga gets the Catatonic Slam! To the floor they go and Umaga lays the boots to HHH. Umaga disassembles the ECW announce table, then the Raw and then the SD one! Umaga misses a chair shot and HHH tackles him over the SD announce table. They brawl as Cole tries to get out of the way. Rights by Umaga and HHH is down. Umaga lays HHH on the ECW announce table, and climbs onto the SD announce table. He runs across all the tables and SPLASHES HHH through the ECW table! Refs check HHH and Umaga scares them away. He drags HHH towards the ring. Umaga scares more people and HHH is up and into the ring. Umaga goes up top…MISSES a head butt! HHH to the floor to look for his tag team partner, and tags in sledgy! He misses and Umaga nails him in the ribs. SAMOAN SPIKE misses, sledgehammer shot and Umaga is rocked. Pedigree and that is all.
Winner: HHH @ 17:30 via pin ***˝
-Todd is here and discussed the voting. He talks about the diva Halloween costume deal. The winner is Mickie James with 21%! Word.
-JBL and Cole talk about the Halloween costume contest.
-We get a Taker vs. Batista video package.
-Todd says over 13-million people voted.
-The special referee will be…JBL stops the drum roll and has a mic. He tells Todd to shut it and knows his great fans voted him into the match. Foley comes out to almost no pop. They stand off and Austin wins with 79%. JBL attacks Foley, they brawl and Austin comes out and STUNS Foley. JBL clotheslines him and talks smack. They brawl, Irish whip and Austin gets a stunner on JBL.
-Lawler replaces JBL on commentary.
WORLD TITLE MATCH: Batista © vs. The Undertaker w/Steve Austin as Special Referee
Batista misses a spear and then eats a big boot. Lock up and they jockey for position. They collide mid-ring and then lock up again. To a corner and Taker misses a right. Lock up and a headlock by Batista. Off the ropes and a bog boot by Taker. He covers for 1. Boot to the head by Taker. Slams Batista to the corner shoulder first and then delivers clubbing shots. Austin tries to break them up and does. Batista fights back and rams Taker to a corner, rights to Taker and then slammed to another corner. To a third corner they go and more rights by Batista. Boots now and Taker is rocked. Shots to the ribs by Batista, Irish whip and a back elbow by Taker levels Batista. Taker covers for 2. Taker gets a figure four headlock, but Batista gets the ropes. Batista laid on the ring apron and Taker wears him out with elbows and a boot to the head. Taker covers for 2. Rights to Batista and Taker is in control. He chokes out Batista and Austin make shim break. Taker slams Batista to a corner, wraps the arm around the top rope again and slams it several times. Taker goes for a charging knee and Batista moves and Taker hits the corner knee first. Boots by Batista and that sends Taker to the floor. They brawl at ringside and Taker is slammed into the steps. Batista then slam him to the apron. Back in the ring now and off the ropes and a the high clothesline by Taker. He covers for 2. Taker works the arm, goes for old school but Batista works him over and goes up top with him. They brawl and Taker tosses him off. Taker back in and covers for 2. Irish whip and then Taker misses a high boot to the corner and crotches himself and falls to the floor. We brawl at ringside and Batista tosses Taker back in, and works the back of Taker. He covers for 2. Taker pulls Batista to the floor and then follows. Boot to the head by Taker. Taker lays Batista on the apron, rights to Batista. Taker onto the apron and gets the leg drop onto Batista. Back into the ring they go and Taker covers for 2. Irish whip by Taker and then the corner clothesline. Another connects as well. Snake eyes by Taker, but Batista lays Taker out on the rebound. They brawl in the corner, but Batista misses a charge and hits the steel post. Taker goes for old school, but Batista catches him and gets the spinebuster. Covers for 2, but Taker gets the triangle choke! Batista is fading…he fights to a knee and rolls Taker over for a count of 2. Goozle by Taker, Batista counters out and then off the ropes and GOOZLE! Chokeslam! Taker cover 1…2…NO! Tombstone try, counter by Batista and a SPEAR on Taker! 1…2…NO! Batista bomb try, Taker backdrops out and then a drop toehold by Batista sends Taker into the corner. Batista lays in the rights, corner mount by Batista, LAST RIDE BY TAKER! Both men are down, Taker rolls and covers 1…2…NO! Taker calls for the end, tombstone try, counter and SPINEBUSTER by Batista! 1…2…NO! TAKER SIT UP! Batista is freaked! Batista bomb try CONNECTS! 1…2…NO! Batista is pissed and gets another Batista bomb! 1…2…3!
Winner: Batista @ 17:25 via pin ****
-Austin hands Batista the title and Batista rolls to the floor.
Remember to send your thoughts on the show: a score from 1-10, match of the night and trash of the night!