WWE Great American Bash '05
July 24th, 2005

Hey... while I didn't get the chance to watch this show (i.e. I would rather earn money rather than waste money), I thought I would post the results here for those of you who actually were concerned that JBL might become the champion again... So let's get to it.

WWE Great American Bash '05
Posted by the Accelerator, July 4th, 2005

Match #1 - M-N-M (Joey Mercury & Johnny Nitro)(c) vs. The Legion of Doom '05 (Heidenreich & Road Warrior Animal), WWE Smackdown Tag-Team Titles Match:

The surprise run of Animal continued here, as the LOD '05 landed the old-fashioned Doomsday maneuver to get the victory and become the new Smackdown Tag-Team Champions. I'd say this signals the end of the Tag Division, but, well... Quick prediction: M-N-M regains the belts within the next month.

Match #2 - Booker T vs. Christian:

This was a competitive match, and probably was a better athetlic battle than the tag match, I bet. In the end, Booker T got the Scissors Kick off the second rope to take out Christian. This extends Christian's PPV losing streak to 8. He still hasn't won a PPV match in 2005. Amazing that he still has any sort of heat left, much less the following he's got.

Match #3 - Orlando Jordan(c) vs. Chris Benoit, WWE United States Heavyweight Title Match:

Ok, this has to be the shocker of the night, as Jordan retained the US Title after smacking Benoit into an exposed turnbuckle. I truly thought Benoit vs. Muhammad Hassan for the US Title was in the cards for Summerslam. With Jordan retaining, all I see now is either a rematch for Benoit or Booker T getting the shot. Either way, it doesn't get under my skin like a Benoit vs. Booker T US Title match would. Oh well. I can still dream of the future.

Match #4 - Muhammad Hassan vs. the Undertaker, #1 Contenders Match:

Unfortunately, this is Hassan's last hurrah, as the death of his WWE character occurred a short time before, thanks to the terrorist-like incident on Smackdown. Thus, the Undertaker practically destroyed Hassan, giving him the Last Ride through the stage after the match. It's really disappointing to me, how a great character like Hassan has been allowed to be cut down by UPN. Ok, so he used 'terrorist' methods on one show. Y'know what? I saw them used on Alias, Lost, and a few other shows this year. Where's the outrage there? It seems to me that wrestling is only perceived as real when it offends somebody. As good as Mark Magnus is on the mic, I have trouble seeing the WWE Creative Team being able to recreate him, which means that Magnus could be on his way out. Depressing.

BTW, who wants to place bets concerning Undertaker/Batista actually happening at Summerslam? I'm betting Undertaker actually gets a shot on Smackdown, gets screwed by Randy Orton, and sets that match up, while (sadly) a rematch between Batista/JBL is set up. No DQ, anyone?

Match #5 - The blue World order (Stevie Richards, Super Nova, & the Blue Meanie) vs. the Mexicools (Juventud Guerrera, Psicosis, & Super Crazy):

The bWo came out on Hot Wheels, which had to be hilarious. The Mexicools, meanwhile, had their tractors, which still has to be offensive to some Hispanics. Then again, my wife laughs at it, so who am I, Mr. White Boy, to judge? Psicosis got the victory for his team after a Top Rope Legdrop on Big Stevie Cool, showing that the Mexicools are the stable that's going somewhere. My only question is, why was this match thrown together, when it could have been Paul London vs. Juvi for the Cruiserweight Title? Where was London, anyway? I know, I know, you've heard that complaint from me before, so I'll walk away from it.

Match #6 - Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio, "Secrets" Match:

This is the match where, if Guerrero wins, he tells Mysterio's 'secret' to Mysterio's son, Dominic. It seemed like this would happen, but Mysterio managed to avoid it, getting a surprise Crucifix Pin to once again beat Guerrero. This would keep Mysterio's secret safe, at least for a few days, as Guerrero admitted he had lied about the stipulation and went ahead and revealed that Dominic was actually his son. Yep, soap opera material, which should have never been needed for this feud.

Match #7 - Melina vs. Torrie Wilson, Bra & Panties Match:

Candice Michelle was the referee in this one, which meant she got to stand around and watch as the other girls tried to rip their clothes off. Melina managed to get the win, stripping Torrie, but her attitude caused Candice to team with Torrie and strip Melina after the match. Candice then stripped herself. Anyone else getting visions of Thesz vs. Rogers? How about Sammartino vs. Koloff? No? I didn't think so. On the one hand, meaningless fluff. On the other, the 3 major divas on Smackdown in bras & panties. Hard to argue with that...

Match #8 - Batista(c) vs. John Bradshaw Layfield, WWE Smackdown World Heavyweight Title Match:

Orlando Jordan quickly tried to get involved to help out JBL, causing Batista to lose it and attack both men with chair shots. This caused the DQ, giving JBL the victory, but allowing Batista to keep the belt. Wait, didn't I see this already, a year or so ago, between JBL and then-champ Eddie Guerrero? I'm almost scared to predict a Bullrope Match at Summerslam between these two. Maybe, hopefully, we'll have a No DQ blood-fest instead.


Alrighty then, there's your results. Hope you enjoyed them at least as much as those who actually watched the PPV. From what I hear, if you missed it, you didn't miss much. Go TNA!!

The Accelerator