WWE Extreme Rules '09
June 7th, 2009

It's been a long time, but since I'm set on getting this website moving again, why not do a review or two? A while back, I purchased a double-set of Extreme Rules '09 and Extreme Rules '10. I actually, though, haven't watched either one of them... until now. So since I've got it, let's see how it holds up now, years later.

WWE Extreme Rules '09
Posted by the Accelerator, February 1st, 2012

- The special features on this disk aren't great. In fact, there is only one: a "Home Video Exclusive" interview of Chris Jericho by Josh Mathews. Not much to write about, there.

- We start things with a very dramatic opening, covering all the big matches of the night.

Announcing Voice: "For one night, all that rules is extreme! (Shows Cena/Big Show) Tonight, fury is unleashed! But where the heart is strong, can his will find a way? (Shows Batista/Orton) A steel cage holds the Viper, the Animal, and their fates! (Shows Edge/Hardy) The climb to the top stirs the soul, tests even the fearless, and pushes the boundaries! At the end, he that falls plummets into anguish, and the victor elevated to champion! (Shows all) Tonight, these men risk their lives, gamble their careers, and take every last chance! Tonight, they go EXTREME!"

Like I said: dramatic.

- Our announcers are Michael Cole & Jerry "The King" Lawler.

Kofi Kingston(c) vs. William Regal vs. Matt Hardy vs. MVP, WWE United States Heavyweight Title Fatal Fourway Match:

They show clips before the match of how Kingston won the United States Title from MVP on the previous Monday Night Raw, and how MVP congratulated Kingston after the match. The announcers talk about how Regal's only in this match due to his brown-nosing of GM Vickie Guerrero. Hardy has a broken hand, which gives him a heavy-looking cast.

One more quick thought before the match begins: is a Fatal Fourway that extreme? I suppose, having four different wrestlers, means that anything can happen. I pretty much like everyone competing, so I suppose I shouldn't complain.

Hardy and Regal seem to be thinking about an alliance to start things, but that doesn't last, as Regal shoves Hardy to Kingston & MVP. This doesn't work out for Regal, as both Hardy and Regal get beat down at first, before things start to get spread out. Kingston gets a big hit early, suicide-diving onto Hardy & MVP, and then nearly pinning Regal after a leaping splash from the top turnbuckle. Kingston looking strong early, nailing MVP with a couple of fast moves, but he finally gets slowed down by Regal's punches and kicks. The fans are giving us a "Regal Sucks", so he's got the heat in this one.

Regal gets Kingston onto the turnbuckle and sets up for a super-double-underhook suplex. MVP comes up, apparently to add to it, but he slips off the ropes accidentally and can only partially contribute to the plunge. All three men are down, with Hardy trying to win by attempting a pin on each man, to no avail. He lands the Side Effect on Regal, but Regal kicks out. Hardy then bodyslams MVP and goes up on the buckle with a leg drop, but again, he can't get the pin. He calls for the Twist of Fate, but Kofi stops that with a huge clothesline, followed by a series of fast moves on both Hardy and Regal, slamming Regal on top and then getting the "Boom Boom Boom" legdrop on both for a 2 count.

Kingston throws out Regal and goes one-on-one with Hardy. MVP tries to interfere from the outside, but Kingston gets a nifty-looking maneuver to kick him away. Regal stops the Trouble In Paradise, though, and suplexes Kingston into Hardy (almost getting Kingston the win by accident). MVP then destroys Regal with a running boot and gives Kingston a nice toss to nearly pin him, with Hardy breaking it up. MVP and Hardy then go at it, with MVP winning out, eventually going "Ballin'" and dropping the elbow. Hardy's taking a beating in this one. Regal breaks up the pin and suplexes MVP. He then gets MVP into the corner and punches away, then avoids a Kingston attack, with Kingston landing on top of MVP's shoulders. Regal grabs Kingston from behind and viciously throws him backwards in a rough-looking landing. Regal then gives MVP a big knee to send him out and gets another suplex to take down Hardy. Regal goes to toss Kingston out as well, but Kingston rebounds from the ropes and comes back, landing the Trouble In Paradise!! Kingston gets the pin on Regal and earns the win, retaining the belt!

Winner, and Still US Champion: Kofi Kingston

Ace Thoughts: Great start to this show. While there were a few sloppy parts throughout, it was still an exciting contest, with Kingston obviously being shown as the great up-and-comer. You see a match like this, and you wonder how Kingston has not yet had a shot at a world title. Very impressive.

- Josh Mathews is shown interviewing The Big Show at his 'private coach', asking him his strategy for his Submission Match with John Cena. The Big Show talks about how Cena can't apply the STFU on him. He also says that if you think Cena getting tossed through a spotlight is bad, tonight will be much worse.

- I had somewhat forgotten how we would have different announcers. The Raw crew is in now, with "Good Ol' JR" Jim Ross and Todd Grisham. They review the Jericho / Mysterio feud, with Jericho dressing up as a masked Mysterio fan and assaulting him. Jericho then tried to unmask Mysterio, with Jeff Hardy making the save.

Rey Mysterio(c) vs. Chris Jericho, WWE Intercontinental Heavyweight Title No Holds Barred Match:

In a surprising start, Jericho doesn't come out to the ring. Instead, he's at a merchandise booth to talk about his opponent.

Chris Jericho: The last time I was at the merchandise stand, I was speaking about John Cena. But since then, I've found an even bigger liar and hypocrite in Rey Mysterio. Not only does Mysterio relish in lying to his fans, he also has the audacity to have the WWE sell these. (Shows Mysterio mask) Instead of being honest and truthful to all of his parasitic fans, he encourages all of you to spend your hard-earned money. He encourages deception.

Jericho walks into the arena, talking about his impersonation of Mysterio's fans. He also talks about knocking out the fans trying to touch him as he heads towards the ring, giving a great promo. He also talks about tearing the mask off of Mysterio's face to expose his 'true self'. You have to love a villain who appears to believe exactly what he's saying.

After all this, Mysterio comes out, wearing a rather evil-looking hood over his mask on the way down. He greets the kids along the way towards the ring, giving several of them head-taps. JR pushes the heritage of the mask even more, including getting in a mention of El Santo. Great reference to me, but I'm betting most watching have no clue who that is.

As soon as the bell rings, Mysterio tackles Jericho and starts to pummel him, taking him outside! He uses the top of the Raw announce table to smack Jericho to the ground, definitely showing some fire. Good to see they didn't waste any time, as both guys hate each other. Jericho gets back into it with an elbow, followed by throwing Mysterio into the guardrail. Mysterio does a somersault over the stairs, though, landing on his feet and kicking the stairs back into Jericho's legs! The two are just beating the heck out of each other on the outside.

Mysterio gets in a nice wrestling move with a hurricanrana off the apron, then tosses Jericho into the ring and gets a leg drop over the top rope for a 2 count. Jericho makes a comeback with a boot followed by dropping Mysterio stomach-first onto the top rope. Jericho then gives Mysterio a catapult into the bottom rope, giving him a clothesline and getting a 2 count. With Jericho in complete control, he beats Mysterio down in the corner. Mysterio tries a couple of counters on a whip to the other corner, but Jericho blocks each one, keeping Mysterio in trouble. But the springboard dropkick fails, with Mysterio countering with own kick to send Jericho to the outside.

Mysterio's next big move is getting a 619 variation around the post into Jericho, knocking him down. Mysterio follows up with a top-rope body splash to the outside, getting some momentum. He drags Jericho back to the ring and Drops the Dime (I don't think it was called that yet), but only gets a 2 on the pin. After a reversal, Mysterio gets Jericho set up for the 619, but Jericho is able to get back to his feet, leading to the two colliding with mutual shoulder blocks. Jericho gets up first, but its Mysterio's quick feet that keep him in control. Mysterio tries a wheelbarrow bulldog, but can't grab Jericho's head, as Jericho seems to be expecting a different move. Mysterio quickly readjusts and does a roll-up, getting a 2 count, with Jericho reversing into his own 2 count. They handled that well, it was hard to tell any mistake.

When both recover, we get a series of counters, almost leading to Jericho getting the Walls of Jericho applied. Mysterio turns it into a roll-up for another close pin. A violent kick to the head almost does it as well, but Mysterio just can't put Jericho away, and he goes to the ropes at the wrong time, getting clotheslined and almost pinned because of it. Jericho pounds on Mysterio's head, and then bodily slides him under the ropes and to the outside in a nasty-sounding landing that earns Jericho a pose. He finally goes out and continues the beatdown, including dropping Mysterio onto the pieces of the announce table on the floor outside. They go back into the ring for another pin attempt, but since that doesn't work, Jericho goes for a submission move, then nearly removes Mysterio's mask!! Mysterio kicks free, saving himself for the moment. Jericho recovers and tries a running charge, but Mysterio avoids him, causing Jericho to crash and burn into the ringpost! Mysterio suicide-dives after him through the middle ropes, sending both crashing to the outside!!

Back in the ring, Mysterio gets a lot of momentum going, landing several quick moves in succession, flying around the ring. He gets Jericho into position again for the 619, but Jericho again counters with a huge reverse, spinning backbreaker that gets a close 2 count (that the fans really bit on). Jericho then manages to block a headscissors into a drop onto Mysterio's head, another rough hit for the cruiserweight. But when Jericho goes for the Lionsault, Mysterio dodges, then gets a reverse 619!! Mysterio tried to do the standing top-rope splash afterwards, but Jericho reverses into the Code Breaker!! It looks like it's over, but Mysterio raises his shoulder at the very last second, with Jericho in disbelief!

Since it's No Holds Barred, Jericho leaves the ring and gets a steel chair, but Mysterio dropkicks it into Jericho's skull! The pin doesn't go, though, and now the fans are losing it for every pin attempt. They know the end has to be near. Mysterio picks up the chair and does a leg drop with it, getting another 2 count. Mysterio sets up the chair in the corner, then is able to give Jericho a drop-toe-hold onto it. But when he tries to follow up with a leap off the chair for a hurricanrana, Jericho blocks it into the Walls of Jericho!!! Just when it seems it's over, though, Mysterio reaches out and gets the chair, folding it up and hammering Jericho in the face!! Jericho falls back into the ropes, once again in position for the 619. But as Mysterio comes in, Jericho reaches out, and in one motion, yanks the mask off!!! Mysterio immediately covers up, allowing Jericho to get a quick roll-up, getting the victory!!!! After the match, Mysterio flees, covering himself up as much as possible, while Jericho hangs onto his new trophies (the mask and the title).

Winner, and NEW Intercontinental Champion, Chris Jericho

Ace Thoughts: Exciting match, and really a surprising ending to it. It really works for Jericho's heel character, as something he would do. Of course, you'd think Mysterio would take precautions, maybe have a mask on underneath (he's done it before), but that's a minor thing. Gotta admit, so far I'm enjoying this one, as the matches have been sensational.

- We get a commercial for "The Macho Man" Randy Savage Ultimate Collection. Glad this got released before Macho passed on. He deserved it.

- Josh Mathews interviews Batista in the back. We get a video package of how Ric Flair (Batista's mentor) showed up on Raw and challenged Orton to a parking lot brawl. It's a great clip, with a bloody Flair getting Orton in the Figure Four on the announce table, only to have Simply Priceless (DiBiase & Rhodes) attack him. The three beat him down in a steel cage, with Orton then having Simply Priceless lock the cage. Batista tries to come to the aid, but he can't get in, allowing Orton to get the RKO on Flair, followed by a head punt. Batista's reaction is pure fury:

Batista: Y'know, Randy, it's one thing when you kicked me in the head and put me out for months. But when you take the same cheap shot on a man that I love and respect, a LEGEND like Ric Flair? That's a whole different ballgame, and I'm going to make you pay. So you get ready for a long road of pain and suffering. You think tonight's the end? Tonight's only the beginning. Tonight, I take away the WWE Championship. Then I'm going to take your pride. I'm going to take your dignity. I'm going to take your health. I'm going to take EVERYTHING! I'm not going to stop until I completely wipe out your entire legacy!

Good intensity, although admittedly, being kicked in the head yourself should be enough motivation. But nice to hear Batista seemingly ready to destroy Orton.

Umaga vs. CM Punk, Samoan Strap Match:

We're shown before the match of Umaga assaulting CM Punk with a strap 3 weeks before. There's no mention of these guys having wrestled each other at Judgment Day '09, so it kind of makes it seem like a random assault. Strange, but ok.

I love how referee Charles Robinson looked kind of nervous to be putting the strap around Umaga's wrist. That makes perfect sense. Punk tries the direct assault early on, which really doesn't go anywhere. Umaga immediately goes for the turnbuckles, but Punk is able to stop him (although he blows the out-of-the-corner bulldog attempt). Punk then tries himself, but gets a Samoan slam for his trouble. Umaga whips Punk repeatedly, and you can see some welts forming. Umaga dominates for a while, as expected. He drags Punk to the ringpost and yanks on the strap, injuring Punk's shoulder. That was an innovative maneuver, I'll give them that.

Umaga stays in control by throwing Punk onto the ropes, then landing a big kick to send Punk to the outside. Of course, this works against Umaga, who now can only reach two turnbuckles. He tries to bring Punk back in, but Punk fights free, then gets a springboard clothesline to take Umaga down. Punk calls for 'nap time', and the crowd barely reacts. They're either burnt out from Jericho/Mysterio, or Punk just doesn't have them yet (he will). The Go To Sleep attempt fails, allowing Umaga to get a spinning kick, taking back control. But as Umaga tries to capitalize with a splash in the corner, Punk dodges, causing Umaga to hit the turnbuckle. Punk then notices the strap between Umaga's legs and pulls, and uh... ouch. Umaga, not surprisingly, rolls to the outside to try and recover. Punk, though, uses the strap again to bounce Umaga's head off the post!

NOW the crowd is into it, with a "CM Punk" chant. This time Punk pulls off the running knee/bulldog combination to put Umaga down. He touches three turnbuckles, but Umaga stops him, yanking Punk into a huge spinning slam variation (not sure what to call it). With Punk down, Umaga starts his own count, getting three turnbuckles. But Punk grabs the ropes with his legs and hangs on, keeping Umaga from getting the last one! Umaga, angry, charges him, but Punk drops the ropes, sending Umaga to the outside! Punk now decides to try the touches, but once again, a guy being on the outside basically makes it near impossible, as Umaga violently yanks Punk backwards before he can get the last one. Punk gets knocked down, with Umaga opting to climb the turnbuckle. But Punk is up, yanking on the rope, and he flips Umaga off the top! Punk tries again, but he still can't quite get to the fourth, as Umaga is back up and trying for the Samoan Spike!! But Punk ducks it, lifts Umaga up, and gets the Go To Sleep!!! Umaga's down, as Punk hits the fourth 'buckle, winning the match! Punk celebrates with the Money In The Briefcase afterwards, with all the fans cheering him... for now.

Winner: CM Punk

Ace Thoughts: I was prepared to hate this, as I've never been a big fan of strap matches. But I'll give credit where credit's due: this wasn't terrible. The crowd got into it, Punk and Umaga delivered, and seeing Punk get the Go To Sleep on someone like Umaga was impressive. They did the best they could with the stipulation, and I applaud them for it. Shockingly, this was Umaga's last big bout in WWE, as he was released a day later (and would, of course, pass away at the age of 36 at the end of '09).

- We now have the ECW announcers, Josh Mathews and Matt Striker, taking over the duties, since it's their title match coming up.

- Gregory Helms interviews the ECW Champion, Christian, asking him about his mindset. Christian talks about being a good friend with Tommy Dreamer, and how tonight might be Dreamer's last night. He's been thinking about it a lot, and he's "going to miss" Dreamer. In other words, he plans to still be the champion. Tommy Dreamer then comes in and talks about what he's done the last 20 years. The two get nose-to-nose, but then Jack Swagger comes in, saying that neither one is going to be ECW champion... and that's all he gets out, as both Dreamer and Christian leave in disgust. Hah!

Christian(c) vs. Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger, ECW World Heavyweight Title Triple Threat Hardcore Rules Match:

The announcers mention that Dreamer's contract expired the day before at midnight, but ECW General Manager Tiffany granted him a one-night extension to compete in this match. If Dreamer loses, he's gone from the company. Incentive! We get the special ring introductions for this one.

Swagger tries to get the other two fighting, but that just unites them against him. Dreamer chases Swagger out of the ring and back in, but Swagger catches him returning with some kicks. Christian comes to the rescue, but then gets slammed hard for his trouble. Christian gets thrown from the ring, with Swagger reversing a Dreamer DDT attempt as well, sending him from the ring. Both Christian and Dreamer go for weapons, and suddenly Swagger isn't as cocky. Dreamer nails him with a Singapore cane, while Christian uses a trash can lid.

Matt Striker: "Tommy Dreamer with his weapon of choice, the Singapore stick."

Oh, Matt... Matt, Matt, Matt... anyway, moving on...

Dreamer uses the CANE in a Russian legsweep to almost get the pinfall, but Christian breaks it up with a lid shot. Christian then moves around some before finally deciding how to hit Dreamer. Dreamer, though, makes a comeback with the cane, giving Christian a painful suplex with it. Christian goes to the outside, as a recovered Swagger beats Dreamer down. Swagger opts then to go for a trash can lid, but he whiff on a charge, with Dreamer tossing him over the ropes. Dreamer now in control, picking up a trash can and running down the apron, doing a backflip with the can into both men! That gets a well-deserved "ECW" chant. Back in the ring, Dreamer goes from the second rope turnbuckle with a Singapore cane clothesline. He then gets Swagger onto the 'buckle upside-down. He gets another trash can and jams it into Swagger's face. With the fans cheering, Dreamer hits his chest for "E.C.W.", but Christian grabs him from outside, causing him to fall! Christian then comes in, does the "E.C.W." chest hits himself, and then runs forward and dropkicks the can into Swagger's face!

Dreamer gets tossed into the can as well for a 1 count, but there hasn't been near enough violence yet. Both Christian and Dreamer fight it out, with Dreamer getting sent to the outside. This allows Swagger to come back with the cane, though, smashing Christian several times before trying a pin himself. A great side suplex almost puts Christian away as well, and Swagger's looking pretty good here. He gets a gut-buster variation followed by a great press slam for another close fall. Angry at the count, Swagger goes and takes the turnbuckle pad off, setting up another move. But as Swagger puts his hand on the ropes, Dreamer nails it with a cane from the outside!! Swagger, hurting, is grabbed from behind and given an inverted DDT, which Christian nearly wins with (Dreamer's too busy getting in the ring).

Dreamer makes Christian pay with another lid shot, followed by a bodyslam onto the lid. He goes up on the second turnbuckle and drops an elbow, but misses, hitting the lid instead. Christian pulls himself up in the ring, scopes out his targets, then runs and jumps out... only to have Swagger hit him with a trash can! Dreamer, meanwhile, is busy putting every weapon into the ring. Dreamer tries to use the Singapore cane to stay in control again, but Swagger gets a gutwrench suplex (remarkably not hitting any weapons lying around him). Swagger then stacks several trash cans next to each other, setting something up. He lifts Dreamer onto the turnbuckle and sets him in place, then sets him for a superplex!! Christian, seeing it, comes in and gets into powerbomb position, sending both down onto the cans!! Christian tries pins on Dreamer and on Swagger, with no success.

Christian decides to go get another weapon, grabbing a crutch and climbing the turnbuckle. But Swagger boots him on the way down, stopping the shot. Swagger appears to think about his finisher, but Christian shoves him away. He loses the crutch, so Swagger grabs it and swings, but Christian blocks it and goes for the Killswitch!! Swagger reverses into an electric chair and drops Christian headfirst on the exposed 'buckle!!! Swagger's finisher attempt is stopped by a crutch to the stomach, though, followed by Dreamer breaking the crutch over Swagger's shoulder!! Dreamer then grabs Swagger and locks him in, landing the Dreamer DDT!!! He makes the pin, getting the 3 count and becoming the ECW Champion!!

Winner, and NEW ECW Champion, Tommy Dreamer

Dreamer emotionally celebrates with the crowd afterwards. Gotta love the guy next to him taking a drink from his beer. It's like a spiritual nod from The Sandman.

Ace Thoughts: Ok, admittedly I've seen better hardcore matches. This one had a few good moments, with Swagger definitely looking like the future star, but I never felt fully hooked into it. Still, it was a great, emotional moment, having Dreamer win the title in his last opportunity. He would hold it for the next few months, near the end of ECW's time, and then wrestled in WWE until the end of the year, leaving them behind (but popping up some in TNA). - In the back, we see Chavo Guerrero, wearing a fake pig nose, inspiring Vickie Guerrero into swinging at his hands and pumping her up. He gets into the pig act a little too much, causing an angry Vickie to punch him in the fake nose and leave. Yikes.

- Jerry Lawler does a special viewing of the hog pen. He says the match is gonna stink. I tend to agree, and am not looking forward to this. He has to explain the match, although it's basically just getting pinned in the slop.

Vickie Guerrero(c) w/ Chavo Guerrero vs. Santina Marella, Miss Wrestlemania Hog Pen Match:

For those who don't know (or who put this out of their mind, like I did), Santina was supposedly Santino's sister. Of course, it's clearly Santino in drag. Yeah. At the time, Vickie was the reigning Miss Wrestlemania (having stolen it from Santina), as well as the Raw General Manager. She also opts to wear a pageant dress to the match, which Lawler properly points out is a bad choice. Vickie then announces that she's making this match a "Handicap" Match, meaning that Chavo's in it as well. Santina can be heard shouting "Not Fair!", while Chavo doesn't look pleased, either, pointing to his nice clothes. She orders Chavo in, even playing the "I'm Your Boss" card.

Revised: Vickie Guerrero & Chavo Guerrero vs. Santina Marella, Miss Wrestlemania Hog Pen Match:

The crowd doesn't seem into this, and who can blame them? Chavo takes off his shoes and reluctantly gets into the pen in his socks. Vickie stays on the outside. Chavo's still upset, as Santina picks up some mud and throws it on him. This ticks off Chavo, who pummels Santina, then throws mud on 'her'. He puts it right in Santina's face. I'm reviewing this? We get a wrestling move finally as Santina backdrops Chavo into the mud. The two fight back and forth, with Chavo throwing slop on Santina now. Cole calls this a 'sloppy match'. Yep. Chavo almost throws Santina into the pig pen, but Santina reverses, and Chavo goes in there instead. He freaks out and jumps back out, only to almost get pinned!

Chavo takes control again, shoving Santina into the mud, then finally tags Vickie in. But Vickie gets up with the slop bucket, threatening to use it. Chavo attacks 'her' from behind, and then threatens his own sliming. But he misses, hitting Vickie instead! As Chavo tries to apologize, Santina slams the slop bucket over his head, taking him out! Vickie tries to leave, looking like she's going to be sick, but Santina grabs her from behind and pulls her down, getting the 3 count to reclaim the Miss Wrestlemania title. Santina leaves with the crowd, while Vickie and Chavo argue with each other in the mud. It takes a while, but it finally ends.

Winner, and NEW Miss Wrestlemania Champion, Santina Marella

Ace Thoughts: I've reviewed it, and now I don't plan on ever watching this one ever again. The funny thing is, watching something like this, you'd think none would be around after a few years, and yet both Santino and Vickie are thriving.

- The official theme song is "You're Going Down" by Sick Puppies. Good song which I've heard before, but honestly, I don't think I ever could have told you the band.

- A video montage shows us footage from Judgment Day, where Orton retained his title by punching the ref, causing the disqualification. The Legacy then attacked Batista afterwards, trying to take him out, only to have Ric Flair come to Batista's aid. On the next Raw, Flair tells Orton that he'll be facing Batista again in the steel cage. Orton sucker-punches Flair, so Flair challenges Orton to a parking lot brawl (that was actually a pretty good match that left both bloody). But Legacy got involved, getting Flair inside the cage and allowing Orton to get the RKO and the punt to the head, with Batista watching.

- We see Chavo and Vickie walking in the back, covered in mud, as people around them react to the smell. Goldust and Hornswoggle come up, with Goldust stuttering through how Vickie smells like shitake mushrooms, and Hornswoggle almost taking a taste (ewww). Chavo tries to convince Vickie that everyone was laughing with them, and not at them. They go into the dressing room, and there's Edge!! He looks at Vickie, saying look what she's become after only two months away from him. Chavo chastises him, with Edge saying that he wants to strategize with his wife. Vickie takes exception, wanting to know where Edge was. He was preparing for his match, which causes Vickie to get furious at him. She says he'll have to face Jeff Hardy all on his own. Edge responds by saying that Vickie should find a good divorce attorney, and leaves her crying on the couch.

Randy Orton(c) vs. Batista, WWE Championship Steel Cage Match:

I like how Batista tries to get to Orton even before the special introductions. That being said, if the hatred is bad enough between these guys, skip the intros and just let them fight.

Awesome. As soon as the bell rings, Orton races up the cage, nearly escaping before Batista can catch him. That fits his current personality perfectly. Batista bounces Orton's head off the cage to drop him back in, then takes him to the corner, beating him down with shoulder blocks. Multiple spears into the cage follow, but Batista goes for one too many, hitting the cage. Orton immediately tries to escape again, but Batista pulls him back in and clotheslines him. He pulls Orton up and suplexes him before trying the first pin of the match, a 2 count. Batista gets up and crushes Orton's head against the steel with Batista's boot. An attempt at a back body drop fails, with Orton kicking Batista in the face. Orton then goes for the door, again trying to escape. Again, Batista blocks him, with the beating continuing.

After a few more Batista shots, Orton finally gets a big move with his standing backbreaker. Orton moves like the Viper should, crawling out the door. Batista catches his legs and drags him back in, before launching Orton into the cage walls a few times. Every side gets to enjoy the sight. Batista then lands a running powerslam for another 2 count. Nice way to show the different ideas in this one: Batista wants the pin, Orton just wants to escape. Orton manages to trip Batista up, dropping him on the 'buckle. With Batista down, Orton finally decides to put on the offense, punching and kicking away. He goes to whip Batista into the ropes, but Batista reverses, then catches Orton and lands the spinebuster!! Shockingly, Batista's already thinking his finisher, giving the Thumbs Down symbol. but Orton's too fresh, back-dropping Batista into the cage!! Both men are down for a little while, as the crowd chants for Batista. But as Batista pulls himself up, Orton lets loose with a beautiful dropkick, knocking Batista's head into the cage!!

Orton then goes up the cage... but then, looking back, changes his mind, deciding instead to go for the Punt!! But Batista dodges, and Orton, immediately realizing the danger, tries to run up the cage. But Batista has recovered, grabbing Orton's legs! He sets Orton up for a Batista Bomb, with Orton grabbing the cage desperately to hang on. Batista pulls him to the center, but Orton punches free. He goes for the RKO, but Batista counters it, then gets him up and lands the Batista Bomb!! Batista gets the pin, and the match is over... surprisingly quickly, honestly...

Winner, and NEW WWE Champion, Batista

Ace Thoughts: I got into this match early on, loving the strategy. But going back and checking it, it was around 7 minutes bell-to-bell. That's extremely short for a title match, and very short for the steel cage match as well. I think these guys probably needed more time. Take out the hog pen match and give all that time to this one, and you've got a more memorable match. Instead, it just seemed to be a little less than expected, given all the build-up to the match.

- We see John Cena getting dressed, and solemnly putting on his hat. After that, we get a video about Cena. People were wondering if he'd lost a step, and questioned his resolve. We see him getting the Attitude Adjustment on The Big Show at Judgment Day. "Hustle, Loyalty, Respect. That is the code in which I live by!" The video switches to The Big Show, getting some vicious hits on Cena, before announcing that their match at Extreme Rules will be a Submission match, supposedly a match that Cena can't possibly win, since he can't get the STF on the giant. We end with the video of Cena getting thrown into a spotlight, courtesy of The Big Show.

John Cena vs. The Big Show, Submission Match:

The announcers (Cole & Lawler) speculate about Cena possibly having a new submission, since his STF won't work. Yeah, that would be the common sense move, but will WWE go that route? We shall see.

Sign In Audience: I Can't See Why They Love You

Yep, the boo-birds were there even in '09. Cena and The Big Show start slow, with Cena trying to stay away. It doesn't work, as his foot is caught, allowing The Big Show to get a clothesline. But when The Big Show goes for a submission, Cena slid free and again tried the STF, but it just wasn't there for him. The Big Show gets up, smiling. We get the same sequence we started with, but this time Cena dodges the clothesline and gets some punches... before getting knocked down again. We've got a slow pace in this one, as The Big Show is content to land multiple big punches on the smaller wrestler. With Cena head-butted into the corner, The Big Show gets a running side splash, crushing him. Cena's down, as The Big Show taunts him, saying "You didn't think this was going to be easy, did you?"

A second attempt at a splash misses, with Cena trying to capitalize with a running bulldog. But The Big Show just tosses Cena away, sending him flying out of the ring. Of course, The Big Show then waits, wasting time as Cena slowly gets back in. The Big Show starts pounding him again, then decides to tie Cena into the ropes. Why? I don't know, but Cena breaks free and fights away. He tries a running shoulder block, which, of course, didn't work, as Cena gets the worst of it. Another gut punch from The Big Show puts him down. "I'm going to break you. You know this!" I'm not loving the moveset, but The Big Show's taunts are pretty good. Finally, The Big Show goes for a submission, trying to get a full nelson. But Cena blocks the fingers from locking, forcing The Big Show to just headbutt him instead. Cena goes back into the corner, with The Big Show again trying a splash. He's 1-for-3, as Cena kicks him to stop the charge, then jumps on The Big Show's back, applying the Sleeper!! It's the Princess Bride scenario, in full effect!!

Cena's really only got a chinlock, forcing the announcers to call it "Cena's variation of a sleeper". The Big Show manages to get free after falling to a knee, then kicks Cena in the stomach and goes for some sort of powerbomb variation. Instead, though, The Big Show falls backwards, and both men crash and burn. Not sure who got the worst of it, although the replay shows Cena hitting hard. The Big Show is up first, standing over Cena and working on his ribs. I think we may have already reached the time given to the Steel Cage match, and it appears we have a while to go. The Big Show continues the slow attack, continuing the gut punches. The Big Show then pulls out a wrestling maneuver, getting a suplex. He smiles and slowly gets up, apparently in full control. He puts his weight on Cena's ribcage, although not all the way up. The Big Show then chokes Cena with the ropes, but Cena slides free. He doesn't get far, as The Big Show knocks him down again, then does the stepping on him routine. The giant then decides to go up to the second turnbuckle and goes for the splash, but Cena manages to move in time.

Cena looks to take advantage, picking The Big Show up!!! But the body slam attempt fails, with The Big Show landing on top of him! The Big Show then goes for a laying submission, his arms wrapped around Cena's neck and shoulders. Cena manages to get free, with The Big Show then opting for a chokeslam attempt. When Cena blocks that as well, The Big Show just shoves Cena over to the outside instead. He slowly goes out after Cena, finally picking him up... and slamming him ribs-first into the steel post!! Ok, that was cool. The Big Show rolls Cena back into the ring and goes after him, getting behind him and applying an abdominal stretch submission in the center of the ring. After some time in the hold, Cena powers his way free. The Big Show goes for the chokeslam again, but Cena reverses into a DDT! He's finally got a shot, and so... he tries for the STF again. Dummy. The Big Show easily shoves him away, kicking him out of the ring. And that gives us another long pause as The Big Show gets up and slowly goes to where Cena is.

The Big Show pulls Cena onto the apron by the head, but Cena fights him off, getting a boot to the head. Cena then climbs the turnbuckle and dives at The Big Show... who catches him in a bear hug submission! Cena struggles, but he's slowly being crushed. He fights back, though, eventually raking the eyes to get free. Cena then gets his flipping facebuster to put The Big Show down! Cena says "You Can't See Me" and hits the Five-Knuckle Shuffle... and The Big Show basically no-sells it, hopping up and grabbing Cena by the throat! Cena blocks the chokeslam again, though, and lifts The Big Show up, getting the Attitude Adjustment!!! That's always amazing on the giant!! But Cena once again has to go for the STF, and The Big Show easily knocks him away again. The STF just won't work. As Cena tries to get back up, The Big Show delivers the knockout punch, sending Cena out of the ring!!

Michael Cole: "And if Cena can't answer the count, this one's over!!"

Er, no, Michael, this is a Submissions match. It can't end on a countout. At least, I hope WWE wouldn't do that.

The Big Show goes to the outside and picks Cena up, preparing to ram him into the post. But Cena falls off the back and shoves The Big Show into it instead, sending both men down. They really shouldn't have shown the replay, as it showed how slowly The Big Show hit the post. Both men get back in the ring, with Cena climbing up onto the turnbuckle and coming off with a flying Legdrop!!! With The Big Show in the ropes, Cena sees an opportunity and uses it, propping The Big Show's leg in between the lowest and middle rope, as if being stretched. He then applies the rest of the STF on The Big Show's head, making a makeshift submission!! I guess being in the ropes doesn't matter? Oh well. The Big Show struggles, trying to get free. I think his foot fell, but they smartly keep it out of camera. Either way, it doesn't matter, as The Big Show has to tap out.

Winner: John Cena

Ace Thoughts: If you can suspend your disbelief in this one, it's not a bad ending. But damn, that was a long match, with not much going on for a lot of it. You have to accept that Cena had to beat The Big Show with the STF, and that other moves (ankle lock, figure four, crossface, et cetera) were not available. That made it a little tough to swallow. But that's just me. I'm sure others enjoyed this one, as it's the typical "giant-killer" run we've seen many times from Cena. He takes a beating, then comes back to win. I'll give them a few points for the finish (and take away one or two for the ropes issue), but I would have rather seen the Steel Cage match get this kind of time.

- Jim Ross & Todd Grisham are back for the Smackdown main event.

- The video montage covers "The Rated R Superstar" Edge and Jeff Hardy, preparing us for their match. It's a match apparently 10 years in the making. We get the deep voice speech, really selling the upcoming battle.

Voice: For nearly a decade, two men have waged war on each other, and in turn, redefined an industry. One with a high-risk/high-reward, leave-no-chance-untaken lifestyle (Hardy). The other with an immoral, opportunistic hunger for power and glory (Edge). Tonight, their years of battles culminate at the apex of extreme! A World Heavyweight Championship Ladder Match!

Great video, showcasing Edge's best hits on Hardy, followed by Hardy's best moves on Edge. Ok, I'm officially hyped to watch this one now.

Edge(c) vs. Jeff Hardy, World Heavyweight Title Ladder Match:

I can't even count how many ladders have been brought out and arranged around the ring and down the aisle. Wonderful visual effect as the wrestlers come in. The crowd chants Hardy's name even before his music begins. Very generic music, I wonder if it's been replaced on this one, or if that's what he had at the time. Hardy makes sure to go under several ladders on the way to the ring, bad luck be damned.

We have a lock-up to start things off, with Edge pushing Hardy back into the corner. He whips Hardy over, but Hardy gets a reversal and takes control. He hammers Edge into multiple turnbuckles, looking out at the ladders every so often. A bodyslam is followed by a legdrop, and surprisingly the crowd's pretty quiet. I guess they're saving their energy for when the ladders come into play. Edge takes back control and drives a shoulder into Hardy's stomach, sending him down. Edge then goes for possibly the Edgecution, but Hardy blocks it and gets a facebuster instead. That appears to be enough, as Hardy leaves the ring and starts trying to decide which ladder he wants. He makes his choice and brings it back, only to have Edge nail the ladder with a baseball slide, knocking it back into Hardy! Edge sets up the ladder, leaning, on the apron, but then Hardy is back to stop his plan. Expect that to come into play later... or maybe sooner, as the two go back into the ring, with Hardy managing to get a body drop on Edge to send him out of the ring and onto the ladder!!

The first ladder makes it into the ring, with Hardy setting it up and starting the climb. But it's way too early, as Edge pulls him down and shoves him into the ladder. Edge is already limping. He's still in control, though, setting Hardy up and, after whipping him into the ropes, lifts him up and into the ladder!! I'm not sure if Hardy was supposed to land on the ladder or not, but the ladder buckles and is pretty bent up as Hardy lands on it. The ref comes around and checks on him, but he must be ok. Edge, meanwhile, angrily throws the bent-up ladder out of the ring and goes to collect another one. He sets it in the corner and comes to collect Hardy, taking him to the opposite corner. With a whip, Edge sends Hardy into the ladder, but Hardy hits too hard, causing the ladder to bounce out around him! Undeterred, Edge sets the ladder back up in another corner and brings Hardy over, positioning him again. Nice improvisation. He backs off and positions for a Spear, but Hardy hops over him, sending Edge into the ladder!!

With Edge seated in the corner, Hardy puts the ladder over him, then gets his turnbuckle dropkick to send the ladder into his foe. Hardy then positions the ladder in the corner again and throws Edge into it. This didn't work well for Edge, and it doesn't work for Hardy, as Edge dodges and Hardy kicks the ladder! To add to the injury, the ladder falls on Hardy, in a painfully unscripted spot! Edge, back up, puts Hardy between the ladder legs and slams on side down on Hardy's leg, then readjusts him and applies the Sharpshooter!! Surprisingly, Hardy is immediately submitting, although, of course, it doesn't matter in a match like this. Edge bodily tosses Hardy from the ring and sets up the ladder (slightly bent up now as well; where'd they get these?). He makes the climb, but Hardy returns via the turnbuckle, getting a missile dropkick into the ladder to send Edge crashing to the mat!! The "Coyote Cam", as always, is the most entertaining shot.

Strangely, Hardy sets up the ladder upside-down. The result is seen a few seconds later, as Hardy drops Edge chest-first into it, getting a huge roar from the crowd!! With Edge in bad shape, Hardy brings in a much bigger ladder, and now Hardy's limping as well. With Edge getting up, Hardy grabs him and lets loose, getting a Twist of Fate!! Hardy then starts climbing the ladder, but it's clearly going to be too far from the belt! Edge is struggling to get up, even as Hardy shakes the ladder, tilting it over to allow Hardy to grab the belt!! But before Hardy can unhook it, Edge is there, grabbing his feet and yanking Hardy back to earth! Both men are down, with Hardy clutching at his left knee.

Edge gets the massive ladder set back up, once again in the corner. He grabs Hardy and whips him, but Hardy reverses, sending Edge into the ladder instead. Hardy immediately climbs the ladder as Edge gets back up, but Hardy isn't thinking about the title this time, as he comes off with a huge Whisper In The Wind!!! Despite the ladder still in the ring, Hardy goes and gets a regular-sized one, sliding it in. He sets it up close to under the title. He then sees Edge getting up and charges him, giving him a Cactus clothesline that sends both out!! Surprisingly, Edge is up first, getting a running boot that puts Hardy back down. Edge grabs another ladder, putting this one up between the apron and the guardrail! That's never a good thing. Edge drags Hardy over and sets him for a suplex onto it, but Hardy blocks it, instead taking Edge away from it with a smack into the security wall near the announcers. Another ladder goes flying into Edge, knocking him down.

Hardy grabs at Edge, intent on the stairs, but Edge reverses to send Hardy into them instead. With Hardy down, Edge gets the top part of the stairs and comes back... and gets it kicked into him by Hardy, who then thumps Edges' head on it. Hardy then repositions the stairs, before running towards Edge, grabbing him as he goes up the stairs and gets a running neckbreaker onto the security wall!! Hardy puts Edge on the horizontal ladder, then sets up a ladder nearby him. But as Hardy poses, Edge recovers and comes up the ladder after him. The two men fight on top of the ladder on the outside, but the ladder decides it for them, falling to the left and sending both men through the horizontal ladder, breaking it with their bodies!!! We get several replays, as the officials at ringside check on both combatants.

Soon, though, both are back in the ring, struggling to their feet. They fight, with Edge getting knocked back into one of the referees, knocking him down. Charles Robinson is still on the outside, and it's not like we needed a ref anyway. Pointless crash there. Hardy climbs the smaller ladder, looking at the title, while Edge decides to go up the larger ladder, thinking about another Spear! But Hardy sees him and grabs him, landing a Twist of Fate from the ladders instead!!! Hardy slowly climbs, with the fans willing him up. Edge tries to stop him, but gets kicked away. So Edge decides to climb the other side of the ladder, punching at Hardy! He knocks Hardy from the ladder, and can touch the title!! But Hardy reaches through the rungs of the ladder and grabs Edge's legs, pulling him down and getting him stuck in the ladder!! With Edge stuck, Hardy climbs the ladder and grabs the belt, smiling down at Edge as he holds the championship right in front of him!!

Winner, and NEW World Heavyweight Champion, Jeff Hardy

Ace Thoughts: I won't say it's the greatest ladder match I've ever seen, truthfully, but I got into it. It was a spot-fest, but then, I wasn't expecting anything else. The ending was definitely different, with Edge forced to watch as he loses the match and his championship. A couple of very impressive moves, as both men put their bodies on the line.

- Jim Ross comes into the ring to interview Hardy, but suddenly CM Punk's music hits!! The fans don't know what to make of it, but I do, as CM Punk is cashing in his Money In The Bank contract on the injured Hardy!

Jeff Hardy(c) vs. CM Punk, World Heavyweight Title Match:

As soon as the bell rings, Punk grabs the injured Hardy and delivers the Go To Sleep!!! The ref counts, but Hardy shockingly kicks out at 2! The fans cheer, hoping that Hardy can somehow come back. Punk goes to pick up Hardy, but Hardy rolls him up, nearly stealing away the victory!! Punk moves off, still completely fresh. He gives Hardy a big spinning kick to the face, and then grabs him for the second time for the Go To Sleep!! That one's just too much to handle, as Hardy can't kick out again! So, just like that, we have another new champion!

Winner, and NEW World Heavyweight Champion, CM Punk

Ace Thoughts: This was where CM Punk's heel turn began, stunning the wrestling fans. It was a great twist, one that many people probably saw coming... they just didn't expect Punk to cash it in on Hardy. Of course, the match isn't really worth a grade, other than that a beaten Hardy was able to kick out of the Go To Sleep, which I don't really think was necessary. Wild finish to the PPV, though. All-in-all, I enjoyed the show. There were some pretty good matches on here, and while a couple of the big matches didn't quite reach what I was hoping for, they were still decent. Just skip over the Hog Pen match. Trust me. For the rest, yep, definitely worth watching.

The Accelerator