Hood: I'm just happy that PerZag safely made it from the back, and now we get to see this dream match!

Rockwell: Dream match? PerZag vs. Blood Dragon?

Hood: Wooo!

*PerZag gets up, looking pleased to have vanquished another foe during the Year of the PERZAG! Blood Dragon is already trying to sit up, but failing, dropping back down in pain.*

Hood: Well, it wasn't much, but I got to see PerZag kick someone's ass, and that always makes it a good day.

Rockwell: Now the question is, who will PerZag be taking on with that Golden Opportunity?

*With his victory over Blood Dragon in the books, PerZag steps out of the ring, walking over to his Golden Opportunity briefcase at ringside. He grabs the briefcase along with a microphone from Minos and slides back into the ring. He walks to the centre of the ring, placing the briefcase on the ground in front of him.*

PerZag: This briefcase in front of me is my opportunity of a lifetime. A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY! That's precisely what it is. I can use this container and the contract inside and request any championship match I want. Any title possible. Oh, wait, except ONE of course.

*PerZag rolls his eyes, shaking his head.*

PerZag: You know, of course, at any moment I would trade this thing right here, for the Number One Contendership for the GCWA World Championship, in an instant. Absolutely instantaneously. Any chance or opportunity to beat up that bald-headed muppet, Mack. That bitch has been avoiding me since 2014.

But, see, I understand that that's not the case. I can't just get what I want. I have to earn every single fucking thing that comes my way. Like the Righteous Rumble match. I fought and clawed my way for seventy fucking minutes for an opportunity at that piece of gold. I put myself through hell, for a chance at the top prize, but as I said, that's not the case.

*PerZag bends over, picking up the briefcase and showing it to the crowd within the arena.*

PerZag: This is the case. But, I will never back down an opportunity at making my case for the World Title, but I need to put some people on notice. I need to show them that they need to be scared. To be feared. And not only by The Big Bifford. But by me, as well.

Whether it's that AQ asshole, and his coveted GCWA Television Championship.

*PerZag starts chuckling to himself.*

PerZag: Ha, that's some funny shit. There's nothing coveted about that title, especially with that asshole holding it. But, maybe, just maybe, I could use this case to shut that asshole up for good. Sew it right up, so no more shit can spew out.

Or it could be the old-timer, the veteran, the legend, the man that keeps on racking up wins over young-ins, Outcast. I might just be able to step in the ring and fight that old bastard and show him what a true blue Aussie fights like. And that Unified X-Division Title would look good around my waist.

*PerZag looks down at his waist, motioning a championship belt around it.*

PerZag: Or I could reclaim a championship I have already won in this company, and defeat the douche known as Shawn Warstein. Maybe that's the choice to make. Perhaps I can just shut him up, claim the GCWA North American Championship back, and leave it at that. Maybe that's the way to go.

*PerZag puts the briefcase back on the ground and starts rubbing his chin, contemplating what title he should go for.*

PerZag: Hmm, they do seem like three excellent options, and the fact that I cannot think of an Option D right now, I might just have to make my choice. But...............

*PerZag puts up a finger, allowing everything to settle in.*

PerZag: .................. I don't have to choose right now, do I? I have all the time in the world to make my choice. Which means that I could even take my time to find myself a tag team partner or a group, and put my opportunity in for the GCWA Tag Team Championships. Maybe that's the right move.

And the reason for that was because I had a group behind me. Friends to call upon and a family to unite with. I had tag partners and squadmates out the wazoo. All these people, to back me up, to make me better. To push me to the top of this FUCKING industry.

*PerZag pauses, taking a deep breath.*

PerZag: And maybe it's time I stop being a lone wolf, a solitary man, and I start this new year off with a new pack or a new comrade. So officially, auditions will be taking place NEXT WEEK. All to see if anybody is WORTHY enough; is SEXY enough, and is the PERFECT fit for the 'Sexiest Man In Wrestling'.

*PerZag drops the microphone and picks the briefcase back up, before walking over to the ropes. He stops, turning around and walking over to pick the microphone up once more.*

PerZag: Oh, and I forgot...................... THE 70-Minute-Man, as well.

*With a wink to the camera, PerZag drops the microphone once more, raising up his Golden Opportunity briefcase*

Hood: One of the greatest wrestlers in history right there!

Rockwell: PerZag definitely has a big decis-

*Before Perzag has a chance to leave the ring, his thunder is stolen when "Disturbia" by Rihanna blasts on the speakers, as Alessandro Quagliaterre comes out dressed up to the nines in a Bien Habille suit, along with a duffel bag.*

Rockwell: Wow, and now this?

Hood: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE???

*Hood was so loud in his shock, that even Alessandro could hear him from his distanced position, and shouted back in response to Hood.*

Quagliaterre: Calm down. I've got business to take care of with that twerp currently standing in the ring.

Rockwell: Hood... you better sit down.

*Hood begrudgingly sat down. Alessandro then turned his attention to Perzag who was still in the ring, while Alessandro remained at his position at the top of the walkway.*

Quagliaterre: Congratulations Perzag, not only did you manage to get to work on time, but you got to reset your year by facing who you should have faced three weeks ago. Bravo.

*Alessandro mockingly golf clapped PerZag's effort.*

Quagliaterre: However since I took you out for spilling coffee on me, and decided to fill in for you... because let's face it as much as the GCWA brass may not like what I say or do... fact of the matter is I'm a hell of a lot more reliable than you'll ever be, and you've been in this company longer than me. It's pathetic really.

*Perzag picks up his microphone to respond, but his response was inaudible.*

Quagliaterre: You're twisting and shouting for nothing PerZag. I gave the audio visual club in the production crew a $1000 each to make sure if you try speaking, whatever microphone you use is turned off. Trust me, no one wants to hear you speak.

Hood: Does Quagmire have the pull to do that?

Rockwell: It's 'Quagliaterre' Hood. I don't know, but there is either technical difficulties with PerZag's microphone, or Alessandro is telling the truth?

Quagliaterre: I can't help but notice that since that night, from Adrenaline Rush to this week's promo you cut before Inferno, you haven't been able to get my name out of your mouth. Your claims are baseless, you've been lying to the audience, and most importantly you've been lying to yourself.

*Alessandro then pulls the items out of the duffel bag which included, The GCWA Television Championship, the January 2021 Newcomer of the Month and Money Maker of the Month awards.*

Quagliaterre: You see these, this proves I'm better than you. I'm aware you had two of these awards last year in March and April respectively. But what you have done since then? Diddily squat!

*Perzag had obviously done a lot more but in Alessandro's opinion they were all meaningless.*

Quagliaterre: Boo Hoo! You lasted 70 minutes in the Righteous Rumble? So you're bragging about being in a match for well over an hour which you ultimately lost. Yowee Wowee! You won a ladder match against Michael Graves and Chad Vargas to get your hands on a Golden Opportunity briefcase. HA! Kids Stuff!

*No love lost by Alessandro.*

Quagliaterre: Here's the deal, that briefcase you've got is worthless. It does however, give you the opportunity to call your shot, whenever, wherever for any title in GCWA except for the World Championship. You're obviously the master of your own destiny, but if you are not a coward and a yellow belly, you'll use that briefcase on me for the Television Championship. And if you do, I'll put you in your place where you belong, on your knees. Peace out, you cuck.

*Alessandro held up a deuces sign to greet PerZag goodbye, as he bounced back to the back with his title belt and his belongings. We fade out to commercial.*

Rockwell: So, this is really happening, and we are calling this?

Hood: *now with a Dragon Zord foam finger on and a Major Helmet replica helmet on* You bet your sweet bippy.

Rockwell: Sweet bippy?

Hood: Just trying out some new catchphrases.

Rockwell: Well, that one is a miss.

Hood: Hopefully this fight misses my car.

Rockwell: Well, let's go to, wherever this undisclosed location is.

Hood: I bet it is Area 51.

Rockwell: Would that give the Starship Desolator home-field advantage?

*The scene cuts to a large field that sits in a valley. The Dragonzord glistens in the sunlight and the shot moves to a camera inside the Zord where the members of L.B.D all sit*

Lucas Thames: Hmm... where are they? It's not like Space Lord to miss a fight.... Of any kind.

*Suddenly “Immigrant Song” by Led Zeppelin begins playing through the mountains and the Starship Desolator appears on the horizon speeding towards the Zord. Zybala starts head banging a little. *

Lucas Thames: Hey, what's that noise? Immigrant Song? I LOVE this tune! Do, do, do, do do do... do, do, do, do do do! Ahhhhh ahhhh ahhhh! Ahh! Ahhhhhhh ahhhhhhh ahhhhh! Ahh!

Peter Vaughn: Luke, whose side are you on?!

Lucas Thames: Sorry, but tune! We win this, I vote we have the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers theme as a victory tune.... Hey look out!

* Lasers begin flying towards the Dragonzord, but the Dragonzord does a forward roll under the lasers. The Dragonzord blows atomic fire from its mouth towards the Desolator, but the Desolator switches its thrust down, shooting the ship up into the sky out of the flame's reach. *

Mike Zybala: Mother fuckers are slippery! I can't get a hit!

Peter Vaughn: Shoot where they'll be, not where they are!

Mike Zybala: I'm trying, Peter! Do you wanna drive?!?

Peter Vaughn: Not really...

Lucas Thames: I DO!!

Mike Zybala: Shit! Incoming! Hold tight!!

* The Desolator then dips sharply into a nose dive and dives like a Peregrine falcon. The Dragonzord moves at the last moment swatting the Desolator towards the ground, but the Desolator pulls the nose up at the last moment and flies between the legs of the Zord. The Desolator shoots a towing cable out and wraps it around the Zord's legs and begins flying around the tangle the legs of the Zord up. *

Peter Vaughn: They're Star Warsing us!!!

Lucas Thames: This is Texas, not Hoth!!

Mike Zybala: Let's see how they like this!!

* Zybala pulls back on some of the controls. The Dragonzord is ready and karate chops the cable away and then follows up with finger missiles! The Desolator does a barrel roll avoiding the missiles as they explode into the side of a mountain causing a rock slide. The Desolator suddenly disappears and is gone. The camera cuts back to the cockpit of the Dragonzord.*

Peter Vaughn: Did.... did we win?

*Thames is suspicious of the Desolator's sudden exit. *

Lucas Thames: I very much doubt it. S.E.X. don't give up just like that. That was too easy... Be ready. If I'm right.... This is not over yet.

Peter Vaughn: Darn it. I'm getting motion sickness!

Lucas Thames: HOLD IT IN, PETE!

Mike Zybala: You are NOT puking in my Zord! I will throw you out of this cockpit!

Peter Vaughn: We're like 300 feet up!

Mike Zybala: Then don't throw up!!

*Suddenly, the Starship Desolator appears behind the Dragonzord using some super sweet Predator cloaking technology. The Desolator uses its thrusters to knock the Dragonzord back where it trips on the crumbled rock as if it were Harry & Marv slipping on Hot Wheels cars. The Dragonzord trips and flies in the air landing on its back. The camera suddenly cuts to the cockpit of the Desolator.*

Space Lord: SURPRISE MOTHERF**KER!

Terry Marshall: WHOA DUDE! Keep it PG, we aren't heels anymore.

* We then get a shot of inside the Dragonzord as Mike Zybala makes the Zord stand again. *

Mike Zybala: FUCK! FUCK! FUCKITY FUCK!!!

Lucas Thames: Ah man! DIRTY MOVE GUYS! But.... Super cool.

Peter Vaughn: Luke! Errrrp! I -

* Lucas suddenly gets a plastic cup and passes it to Peter Vaughn. Zybala turns his head and glares at Vaughn.*

Lucas Thames: Pete... If you're going to hurl... hurl into that...

Mike Zybala: Three hundred feet, Pete. Choke it down!

* With the Zord now standing it lets out its signature roar and storms towards the Desolator, grabbing it and shaking it. *

Lucas Thames: Alright boys... now careful not to scratch it... heh.

* Back in The Desolator. *

Space Lord: DON'T TOUCH THE TRIM!!!!

Terry Marshall: They are doing more than touching it brother.

Space Lord: SARGENT CONVERT POWER TO ELECTRIC FIELD!

*Suddenly, a glowing field of electricity surrounds the ship and begins to shock the Dragonzord. The Dragonzord shakes and sparks fly from its nose. The Zord drops the Desolator and staggers backwards into a mountain. The Desolator lands hard on the ground.*

Private Bug Girl: CAPTAIN WE USED TO MUCH POWER! Thrusters are down.

*Space Lord stands slowly and dramatically.*

Space Lord: It's morphin' time.

*The Starship Desolator begins to transform from a Starship to Zord of its own. Of course it isn't a sweet dragon, but it is a pretty sweet looking space samurai. We cut to the Dragonzord cockpit to show L.B.D. staring in shock. *

Mike Zybala: Okay. That's fucking cool!! It's a real fight now, boys!

* In the Desolator. *

Terry Marshall: Brother, I didn't know this thing could morph.

Space Lord: To be fair, you didn't even know aliens existed until two years ago.

Terry Marshall: True.

*The Desolator pulls a sword from its back as the Dragonzord stands back to its feet. Both massive machines let out a battle cry and charge towards one another and as they charge towards each other, LBD and S.E.X. all let out battle cries of their own!*

Lucas Thames: Brainbuster the thing!

*The Zord “locks up” with the Desolator Samurai, grabbing it and taking it down in a brainbuster! The Zord reaches down to grab the Samurai by the head, but the Desolator swings the sword up, cracking the Dragon in the head. The Deso-Rai jumps to its feet as it and the Zord prepare to charge one another again. Suddenly, a laser torpedo explodes into the ground between the two zords!! The two zords turn to see a black spaceship sailing into sight. The ship looks rather old and seems to be held together with Duct tape. *

Terry Marshall: Who, or what is that?

*Space Lord then notices there is a giant "NWO" painted on the ship in white. A communication helm comes across and Space Lord opens the com channel.*

Dennis Rodman: YO! YO! YO, IT'S THE NWO!

Major Flavor: TIME TO GO TO FLAVORTOWN BITCHES!!!

*A giant bay door opens on the side of the NWO Ship and S&M are each manning a mini-gun and begins firing at the Dragonzord and the Deso-Rai.The Deso-Rai's sword expands and becomes a shield while the Dragonzord turns to the side, trying to shield the cockpit. *

Space Lord: I hate to say this, but I think we may need to form a temporary alliance.

Lucas Thames: The NWO?! OK...we've got to help out S.E.X! They beat us in a match yeah, but this is for the greater good!

Mike Zybala: (speaking Japanese but has English subtitles) "They brought guns to a Mech battle! They insult the honor and sanctity of our sacred duel!

Lucas Thames: .....Okaaaay.... Also a good reason. S.E.X. Let's do it!

* Zybala and Vaughn slowly turn their heads towards Lucas as he looks back at them. *

Zybala and Vaughn: Uhhhhh...

Lucas Thames: Oh, get your heads out of the gutter, you two. We have an epic mech duel to win!

* The Dragonzord lets out another roar before L.B.D. look at one another smiling.*

Lucas Thames: Missiles?

Mike Zybala: Atomic Fire...?

Peter Vaughn: Missiles AND Atomic Fire?

Mike Zybala: BRILLIANT!!

* Zybala pulls out the Dragon Dagger and starts playing as Lucas and Vaughn start hitting buttons. The Dragonzord roars out its atomic breath as missiles shoot out from its fingertips! The NWO ship drops out of the blast zone, not like it's dodging but like it lost power. Zybala plays a different tune and the Dragonzord's drill tail starts spinning as it swings at the falling ship. Another miss! The NWO vessel powers back to life just in time to avoid the tail swing! It starts circling Deso-Rai and Dragonzord, still firing it's mini guns. *

Mike Zybala: Damn, these assholes are slippery.

* He pushes a button on the console and opens up communications with S.E.X. *

Mike Zybala: You know these guys. We're open for ideas if you got them!

Space Lord: Jam their radar system.

*Suddenly a large missile with the word “Smuckers” on the side fires from the Deso-Rai and goes just in front of the NWO.*

Mike Zybala: DAMN IT! YOU MISSED?

Space Lord: Oh did I?

*The jar slams into the side of the mountain and jam splatters all over the NWO ship, jamming the radar of the NWO ship.*

Lucas Thames: I mean..... That's cool and all... but I call that a waste of jam...

Space Lord: NOW BLIND THEM!

Lucas Thames: Do we have an oil slick in this thing?

Mike Zybala: No, but we have THIS!

* Zybala presses some buttons and the Dragonzord's mouth open. Out comes a stream of fireworks. Think Jubilee from the X-Men cartoon. The sparks pour over the NWO ship, blinding them with light! *

Terry Marshall: Good job brothers, now let's take these guys out.

*The NWO ship appears to have crash landed and as the Dragon Zord and the Deso-Rai move in on the ship and suddenly the NWO ship burrows into the ground digging deep into the ground to retreat.*

Space Lord: Can you guys do that?

Lucas Thames: I don't know. Can we? I guess not.

Terry Marshall: I guess they got away this time.

Space Lord: Next time... will be their last time. Until then L.B.D I think we call this a draw.

*The Deso-Rai extends its mech hand to the Dragonzord and the Dragonzord embraces in giant robot handshake.*

Lucas Thames: This was fun. But next time S.E.X... next time. That said, we're always around to take down the NWO...

Mike Zybala: (spoken in Japanese again) Like the flower that blooms in the Spring, this alliance blooms as well. Let it be know, should the NWO show their wicked heads, we will be there to help S.E.X. beat back the forces of Nefariousness! That is the code of SUPER SENTAI!!

* At the "Super Sentai" part, Zybala strikes a pose. He looks at his teammates and feels foolish when he sees that he only is posing. We cut back to Rockwell and Hood.*

Tag-Team Match
BOB (Miss Fury & Thunder Knuckles) (0-0) vs. Wrath of the Storm (Thunder & Lightning) (0-14)

Minos: The next match is scheduled for one fall... making their way to the ring... weighing a combined 420 lbs... from El Paso, Texas... here are Thunder & Lightning... Wrath of the Storm!!