Hood: Not a chance in hell.

Rockwell: It is tempting, though...

Hood: Extremely...

Rockwell: Yo, attendant! Get rid of this, will you?

*As "Cocky" by Kid Rock plays, Lurrr appears in the entryway, posing and showing off his usual attitude. He walks down the aisle, mouthing off to some of the fans at ringside before rolling into the ring.*

Rockwell: Lurrr spent some time this week talking to some impressionable teenagers at a high school. I don't know if he gave the greatest advice, however.

Hood: All extremely sound advice that made him the multi-time champion he is today!

*The Bell Rings.*

Rockwell: And here we go! Two of the legends of the business, facing off in the return of the GCWA! Who ya got, Hood?

Hood: Good point.

*Both men have already moved to the center of the ring and are talking trash, just like they have all week long leading up to this contest. The war of words flies back and forth, with everyone trying desperately to hear what's being said. It doesn't matter, as it all ends with Lurrr slugging Bifford, and Bifford returning the shot, and now we have a brawl! Both men fire repeatedly at the other, with Lurrr able to block a few and get in some clean hits. He then turns and goes to the ropes, returning with a shoulder block... but Bifford doesn't move. He challenges Lurrr to do it again, so Lurrr does, and again, Bifford stays stationary. A third attempt ends with Bifford trying a clothesline, but Lurrr ducks under it and comes back, this time dropping low and chop-blocking Bifford's leg! Bifford limps away, but doesn't go down, as even his legs have a lot of bulk to them.*

Rockwell: Lurrr knows the best strategy to defeat Bifford is to chop him down.

Hood: I'm a specific kind of guy.

*Lurrr keeps up the attack, hitting another chop-block, but Bifford still doesn't go down. He does grab at the ropes to steady himself, however. As Lurrr, frustrated, tries to come in a third time, Bifford raises his knee, cracking it against Lurrr's shoulder. While it still hurts Bifford, causing him to clutch at the ropes for support, Lurrr goes flipping backwards. Stunned, Lurrr shakes it off and starts to stand again, but Bifford has already gotten there, clubbing at Lurrr's back with large fists, driving him back to the canvas. He smashes Lurrr down a few times, then takes a step back and returns, dropping with a quick splash onto Lurrr's back! The ref can't count that way, so Bifford has to roll Lurrr over before trying for the pin attempt... 1... 2.. and Lurrr's shoulder is quickly up to keep this contest going.*

Hood: It almost ended within minutes!

Hood: Damn straight it's not. He's won so many matches simply because his opponents can't kick out, even if they're still conscious.

*Bifford gets back to his feet, always an art in itself, and then grabs at Lurrr. He picks the smaller wrestler up, trash-talking him once again. I mean, literally, calling him trash. He lifts Lurrr up, locking him into a bearhug. Lurrr's struggling now, feeling his spine being driven into the bulk of Bifford. He resorts to a headbutt to try and get free, but Bifford just laughs it off, and slams him back with a headbutt of his own! Two more headbutts follow, and Lurrr is slumping in Bifford's arms. He calls to the ref to check, and he comes in, raising the arm of Lurrr. He immediately reacts, reaching out and going to the eyes, raking across to blind Bifford! This causes Bifford to drop the hold, as he stumbles back, trying to clear his vision. The ref admonishes Lurrr, complaining about the blatant cheating, and Lurrr raises his hands to him, apologizing... even as he kicks out with his leg behind him, scoring a low blow!! Bifford groans and finally takes a knee. The ref is looking around Lurrr, suspecting that he just missed something, but Lurrr did it so smoothly that he can't do anything about it.*

Hood: Vintage groin strike!

Hood: There's a reason he's held so many championships! Dude will break any rule he can to win!

*With Bifford still down on one knee, breathing heavily, Lurrr moves in, smacking him with a series of elbow shots, followed by some knees. He's intent on doing damage when he's got Bifford in trouble. He turns Bifford around, hanging his head on the middle rope, and puts the back of his knee there, choking Bifford out! The referee moves in, counting to 5, and Lurrr barely breaks in time, shrugs to the referee, and then goes right back to it with a fresh count. A second break is forced, and Lurrr cockily waves the referee away, then chokes Bifford a third time! The referee, fed up, counts quickly this time, and Lurrr breaks the hold, angrily arguing with him. Lurrr's leg shifts, like he's considering a Wake Up Call, but he pulls it back down, knowing in his heart that taking out the referee would cost him a great deal. He turns back to the recovering Bifford, grabbing him by the hair, but Bifford reaches up as well, grabbing Lurrr by the throat! The referee moves in again, warning Bifford, who rises up while keeping his grip. Lurrr tries to fight it off, but Bifford, furious, absorbs the hits, pushing Lurrr into the corner by the throat. He starts nailing Lurrr with forearm shots, doing as much damage as possible.*

Hood: Bifford has risen!

Hood: It's all your fault now...

*With Lurrr sagging into the turnbuckles, The Big Bifford turns away from him, seemingly looking at the referee. But Bifford had a plan in mind, and now he's implementing it, driving his weight backwards repeatedly into Lurrr! Even the fans in the audience who despise Lurrr are wincing in sympathy for the GCWA Hall of Famer. Bifford finally limps away from him, still trying to readjust... down there. He pushes the referee aside, takes a deep breath, and then turns, roaring, as he runs back towards Lurrr. At the last second, Lurrr gets his boots up, kicking Bifford back away from him and avoiding being crushed. Bifford shakes it off and charges in again, but Lurrr's feet are up a second time, knocking him back. Lurrr then quickly jumps onto the second turnbuckle and hops off, scoring a double axehandle blow. Bifford staggers, but doesn't topple, so Lurrr goes back up, this time to the top turnbuckle, and comes off with a second double axehandle, and this time, after a second, Bifford falls, hitting the ring hard enough to shake the referee.*

Hood: TIMBER!

Hood: Yep, sorry, instant regret on my part.

*With Bifford down, Lurrr works his way over to the turnbuckle and climbs up as nimbly as he possibly can. At the top, he sizes Bifford up, then leaps, delivering a beautiful frog splash!! After a second of recovery time, Lurrr rolls over and goes for the pin, trying to hold Bifford down... 1... 2... but Bifford lifts his shoulder up! Lurrr angrily snaps at the referee, wanting a quicker count next time. The referee shakes his head, saying he's just doing his job. Lurrr wants him to do better at it. He heads back to the turnbuckle, climbing up again, determined to end this one. However, behind him, Bifford is rising up! Lurrr sensing that something has changed, takes a second to think about it, and then decides to throw caution to the wind, turning and leaping at his opponent from the top rope! But Bifford manages to catch Lurrr in mid-air and immediately twists, powerslamming him into the mat!! This took a lot out of The Big Bifford as well, but he's able to hold himself in position on top to make the official cover... 1... 2... No! Lurrr kicks out!*

Rockwell: Lurrr survives again!

Hood: I'm not talking about quitting, I'm talking about surviving!

*The Big Bifford is working to get up, with the toll of the match weighing heavily on both competitors. Both of these wrestlers have a lot of mileage on their speedometers. But Bifford is able to get up first, grabbing at Lurrr and pulling him in closer. He gets a double underhook on Lurrr's arms, lets out a shout, and then drops back with a double underhook DDT! Lurrr might be out at this point, as Bifford manages to roll him over for the cover... 1... 2... Lurrr grabs at the ropes with his hand, staying alive! Bifford, stunned, asks the referee how that could be possible, apparently arguing that his matches have different rules to them, and that grabbing the ropes shouldn't count for his opponent. The referee's not buying that argument. Annoyed, Bifford reaches down and yanks Lurrr up, giving him a boot in the stomach to bend him over. He sets Lurrr up, wanting the Biff End!! But Lurrr kicks free, steps back... and lands the Wake Up Call!!! Bifford's jaw gets jacked, and he tumbles backwards... into the ropes, getting tied up!! Lurrr, regaining his balance, wants the pin, but soon is frustrated as Bifford is fully wrapped in the ropes!*

Rockwell: An amazing shot out of nowhere from Lurrr, but luck was not on his side!

Rockwell: But he could have gotten the pin and the victory. He can't defeat Bifford in the ropes!

*A ticked off Lurrr kicks away at Bifford, at least using the situation for what it is. The referee is on the other side, trying to free Bifford's massive arms from the ropes. Lurrr doesn't seem anxious to help, as he's kicking and chopping away, letting out his aggravation. Finally, Bifford's right arm gets freed, and he slumps down. His left arm is still wrapped, though, and Lurrr decides to take advantage, putting his boot up under it and twisting, trying to do some damage. Bifford, hurting mightily, tries to push Lurrr away with his free arm, but Lurrr is relentless. He's trying to take Bifford's arm strength away from him. Bifford gets in another shove, then yanks, managing to free himself from the ropes. He rolls to the corner, holding onto his left arm painfully. Lurrr follows, mocking him, before going for another kick. But Bifford catches the foot with his good arm, glares at the off-balance Lurrr, then yanks him in, causing Lurrr to bounce his head on the turnbuckle pad! Lurrr staggers off, stunned, as Bifford works on recovery.*

Rockwell: If Bifford can get himself up, he's still got a shot here!

Hood: That would sound ridiculous for anyone other than Bifford.

*Bifford, using the turnbuckle as well as the ropes, is starting to get back up. He takes a moment to catch his breath, not knowing that Lurrr has repositioned behind him, setting up for another Wake Up Call! But perhaps Bifford did realize, because as he turns, he's able to catch Lurrr's foot in mid-strike, using his good arm. He spins Lurrr around, setting him and landing an atomic drop! Lurrr flops forward, feeling it reverberate throughout his body. He claws at anything within reach, which includes the referee, as Lurrr uses him to drag himself up. The referee tries to pull free, complaining, but the dazed Lurrr isn't letting go. This is unfortunate, as Bifford suddenly pulls himself out of the corner and charges forward, clocking Lurrr with a clothesline from behind... while also taking out the referee!! Both go down, with The Big Bifford barely noticing the downed referee. He's probably used to other federations, where more referees are available. The GCWA's ref budget is still pretty low.*

Hood: Do we have anyone else back there with a striped shirt on?

Hood: Damn it, get Ace out here then! He can still count, right?

*The Big Bifford leans heavily on the ropes, still trying to shake some blood back into his left arm. He turns back, reaching down to grab Lurrr... and gets a handful of shirt. He looks down, confused, and finally realizes that the referee is out cold. He looks from the referee to Lurrr, seemingly blaming Lurrr for the ref being down. After shaking him for a few seconds, Bifford shrugs and goes back over to Lurrr, hauling him up. He looks Lurrr in the eyes, taunting him once more about not being good enough, before kicking him in the stomach. Bifford then sets Lurr in place for The Biff End, the jumping piledriver!! But at the last second, Lurrr pulls himself back down, landing on his knees on the mat... and firing upwards with his right arm with the second low blow of the match!!! Bifford, his face white, starts coughing and stumbling away, in absolute agony. He turns back, and Lurrr comes in with a Wake Up Call!!! Bifford falls backwards, but rebounds off the ropes, keeping him upright, so Lurrr lashes out once more, landing a SECOND Wake Up Call!! Bifford crumples forward, crashing to the canvas. Lurrr pushes him over, and then grabs at the referee, dragging him towards Bifford. He then makes the pin, with the dazed referee not even looking up as he just starts doing a slow count... 1..... 2..... 3!!!!!*

Minos: Here is your winner... Lurrr!!!