Tenay: We're back, with 6 major matches still on the line. In the next
2 hours, 5 titles will be defended. The odds alone show that sooner or
later, a title will change hands. Who will pull out the victory? Will
we have a new Heavyweight Champion? Will Animal Thug dethrone Hawaiian
Heat as the European Champ? Will Mankind still be insane? Keep watching,
the matches are on the way! |
Penzer: Ladies and gentlemen, the next match is scheduled for one fall... introducing first, coming down the aisle... weighing 356 lbs, and standing 6'6" tall... accompanied to the ring by Judd "The Stud"... the newest member of the GCWA... "Amish" Larry Destiny!
*A loud chorus of boos go up, along with a chant of "Larry Sucks", as the bearded, balding man walks out... he heads for the ring, along with his manager...*
Heenan: Destiny's an imposing wrestler, but he's making his debut tonight against one of the best in "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. This one is definitely worthy of a PPV, boys. I can't wait to see how Destiny performs here tonight!
Penzer: His opponent... known around the world as one of the Toughest S.O.B.s in the game... standing 6'4", and weighing 265 lbs... the former GCWA World Heavyweight Champ and IC Champ, as well as one half of the Tag-Team Champs... "Stone Cold" Steve Austin!
*The fans go nuts as glass breaks, and the Rattlesnake appears... he heads towards the ring, walking by the fans... he enters the ring, then looks at Larry Destiny and flips him off... the fans cheer... Destiny charges in, and the brawl begins... the bell starts ringing...*
Tenay: Oh boy, that lit the fire!! Destiny and Austin are fighting with both fists cocked! Something tells me we're not going to see too many wrestling moves in this one! Destiny obviously has a weight advantage, but you can't knock the experience and brawling ability of Austin. Destiny's using some strong rights, but Austin's coming right back at him. The ref's just watching, staying out of the way, as the two continue to slug each other!
Heenan: This is going to be one heck of a fight! Austin takes control with a rapid punch to the large gut of Destiny, then runs off the ropes and lands a spinning neckbreaker! That one put the big man down! Austin starts to pull Destiny to his feet, but Destiny shakes him off, then lands multiple punches to the stomach. Austin steps back in pain, then gets hit with a Tumbling Powerslam from "Amish"! Destiny gets up and 'salutes' the fans, who are booing once again. He turns around, and Austin's back on his feet, coming in with a clothesline that rocks the heavyweight! Austin does it again, running off the ropes and coming in with another one. This one puts the big man down on one knee, but not completely down. Austin doesn't waste time, though, running in and straddling the head of Destiny, knocking him all the way to the mat, then starts driving his fists into his skull!
Tenay: Austin's on fire now! After a couple more shots, he goes for a pin, but only gets a one count. He gets up, bringing Destiny along by his beard! Austin signals, then goes for a body slam, but Destiny's too fresh. He's able to bring all his weight to bear, landing on top of Austin! 1... 2... Austin kicks out! "Stone Cold" almost cost himself the match there! It takes a lot of power to lift someone Destiny's size!
JR: Austin has the power, I think, but Destiny's still pretty conscious of what's going on. He gets up, looks down at Austin, then runs off the ropes. He comes back, dropping a massive elbow onto the chest of Austin! What a hit! Austin's hurting now, that's for sure! Both wrestlers get to their feet, with Destiny lending Austin a "helping" hand. He gets Austin up, then throws him outside, through the ropes! Destiny follows, jumping off the apron with a Double Axehandle to the back of Austin. The big man then goes and shoves Penzer away from his chair, then grabs it. He comes back with the chair, with the ref watching from the ring, but Austin comes alive, slamming his arm into the chair and causing it to rebound into the forehead of Destiny!!
Heenan: That was a good move to get Austin back into this one, guys! Destiny's staggered, and Austin's going to take advantage, lifting Destiny up and slamming him on the outside!! You were right, JR, he did have the power! Austin comes over and sits on Destiny's chest and starts pounding away. He suddenly looks up at the ref, however, then grabs Destiny, lifting him up and rolling him into the ring. The two wrestlers barely beat the double countout.
Tenay: The ref was being lenient, but it was still close. Austin's got control now, lifting Destiny up and using a DDT to send him back down again. Austin rolls him over and goes for another pin... 1... 2... NO, Destiny's still alive. Austin looks a bit perturbed now, smacking Destiny across the face. The chops resound throughout the building, getting the fans to cheer. Austin then comes off the ropes with his hands locked together, but Destiny somehow ducks the Axehandle shot and catches Austin with a version of the Big Boss Man's slam!! Austin's down, and Destiny doesn't look much better!
JR: Judd is slamming his hands on the mat, as Destiny slowly gets to his feet. The fans are quiet now, seeing Austin on the mat. Destiny comes off the ropes and drops his head against Austin's, then makes a pin attempt... 1... 2... NO! Austin's not done yet either! Destiny gets back to his feet and waves it off, saying that it's about done. He grabs Austin and sets him up for the Thrilla Killa Piledriver! No, Austin breaks free and throws Destiny with a release German Suplex!
Heenan: Both wrestlers are down again! This one's reversed itself so many times, I don't think either wrestler is ahead on points!
JR: Luckily, Weasal, we don't use the points system. Austin's getting back to his feet first. He looks a little unsteady, but he's still moving faster than Destiny! It's probably those extra pounds! Destiny's a strong guy, but it doesn't look like his endurance is holding as long as Austin's is! Austin grabs him by the beard once again, yanking hard on it. That's a move in its own right! Austin then turns and steps away, only to come back with a huge Discus punch that sends "Amish" flying down to the canvas!
Tenay: And now Austin is waiting, watching Destiny get up! This could be it, ladies and gentlemen! Wait, Judd the Stud just slid a chair into the ring! Why'd he do that? Now Judd's running to where the action is, climbing up on the apron and distracting both Austin and the ref! Austin comes over, threatening to nail Judd, but Destiny's up with the chair! Judd's got the ref distracted! Austin turns around and walks back to the bent over Destiny, who comes up fast and clocks him with the chair!
Heenan: Austin's leaning on the ropes! Destiny drops the chair on the mat and lifts Austin up, using the Thrilla Killa Piledriver on the steel chair!! Austin has got to be unconscious!! When the ref turns back, Destiny's pinning the Rattlesnake, while the chair is on the outside once again with a huge dent in it! The ref looks surprised for a second, then comes over and makes the count... 1.... 2.... 3!!!
JR: What a shocking upset!! Larry Destiny, thanks to his manager, came out the winner over "Stone Cold" Steve Austin!! Austin is out cold! Destiny's got his hand raised by Judd, while the fans are really letting him have it! The ring is littered with debris as Destiny, with help from Judd, leaves the ring. Austin just got robbed on this one. The ref is checking on Austin, who suddenly seems to wake up, shoving the ref back. He's bleeding from a wound on his head, but I don't think he's that concerned about that. The ref's trying to check on Austin, oh, but the ref just got the Stone Cold Stunner!! Austin stumbles out the ring, leaving a knocked out ref behind him! Hawaiian Heat is out now, checking on his partner. While they're waking up the ref, let's take a look at what went down there.
*Many of the moves are shown, including the release german suplex and the chair shots... the replay ends with the Thrilla Killa Piledriver onto the chair...*
Heenan: Sometimes things happen. Austin was outnumbered, and the odds took him out at the end. Judd the Stud should get a star for this one, or at least a Pig's Eye beer from Destiny. They're cleaning up the ring now, although I don't know why, considering the next bout. Let's see some clips about why Jesse James will be facing Mankind in a rematch from the last PPV.
*Images from the first James-Mankind title fight are shown, with Mankind winning the Hardcore Title... then a clip of the match between Sting and Jesse James came across, with James winning with the Fame-Ass-Er... a few of the comments by both wrestlers are aired...*
JR: These guys are primed for a heck of a rematch. Last time they fought all the way to the parking lot. This time, well...
Tenay: Wait, JR! We've just received word that the fight has already begun! Let's go, live, to one of our cameramen, who's in the locker room area!
*The shot switches to a camera angle, where Jesse James and Mankind are brawling down the hall... many things have been left in a mess behind them, including, apparently, a man who was in the wrong place at the right time, and who is now laying on his back...*
Heenan: These guys are nuts! They didn't even want to go to the ring! Is this legal, or do we need to start it with a bell first??
Tenay: I have no clue, Bobby. We've been told that the referee for this match is on his way, but until he gets there, pinfalls won't count for much. James looks to be bleeding from a wound on his shoulder, but right now he's got control, lifting Mankind up and slamming him into the wall! Mankind is down, and James is doing crotch chops over him! What a fight! I'm just sorry we apparently missed some of it!
JR: I'll say! Did you see that hallway? The place has been wrecked! James grabs Mankind and throws him down the hallway, narrowly missing our cameraman. Our boys are risking life and limb tonight, ladies and gentlemen! I'm not sure where James is going with Mankind, but it's definitely a fight! He whips him into a stack of tables, knocking a bunch of them down. Mankind's right back up, though, coming back with a right hand. He grabs James and throws him right back into the tables, cracking a few of them! Dang, but these Hardcore matches are bad on tables!
Tenay: Now Mankind's dragging James over to a fire extinguisher! He, oh my god, he slams James' head through the glass window! The alarm is blaring, and James is hurting plenty! Mankind's yelling something about a fire, I can't understand him over the noise! Someone needs to tell the fire department to forget it. Now Mankind's got the fire hose! He's pulling it out and wrapping it around James' throat! We've got a chokehold now, but still no referee to check for submission!
Heenan: Like either of these guys would submit, Mike! James shoves Mankind back, then takes the hose off and turns it on, spraying Mick Foley back! A good counter-maneuver, I guess! James turns off the hose, then runs in, smashing Mankind over the head with his fists! The two stagger backwards, then Mankind spins and throws James through a doorway! Boy, this arena's never going to be the same! Wait, the referee's there now! He finally found the chaos! They're headed down some stairs now, and... JR, did that sign say "Boiler Room"??
JR: I think it did, Bobby! And Mankind's taking James in there! This has turned into a Boiler Room match! Mankind's on his own turf! Now James is really in trouble! The ref follows, as Mankind whips James into a steampipe. The room is filling up with smoke, but we can see both guys brawling now. James comes back swinging, rocking Foley, then sends him straight into the oncoming steam!! Foley's down, clutching at his face. James comes in under the steam, grabbing Foley and tossing him into the side of the wall, causing parts of it to crumble! Both of these guys are fighting to the limits of their lives!!
Tenay: James positions Mankind and goes for the Fame-Ass-Er, but Mankind slips out of it, falling to the ground. James is pretty tired as well. I don't know how long they've been fighting, but both of these guys are spent! James shakes off the cobwebs, then kicks out at Mankind, knocking him down. He then steps in, but Mankind comes back with a wrench he picked up, snapping the Roaddog's head back! James is down to one knee. He grabs a pipe and yells, taking his hand away quickly. That must be a pretty hot pipe! Mankind takes advantage of James' distraction, coming in quickly with Mr. Socko! James sees it and tries to dodge, but he's not fast enough! Mr. Socko the dentist is paying another housecall!!
Heenan: Mankind is just choking him down with that Mandible Claw of his! James is trying to fight out, but no, he's going down! He doesn't have enough energy to escape! As soon as James' back hits the floor, the ref starts to count... 1... 2... 3!!! Mankind defends his title! The Boiler Room, the hallway, and the arena are trashed! But at least they cleaned the ring, right, fellas?
JR: Sure, Heenan, whatever. That was some great action! I can't help but wonder who started the fight, Mankind or James. It started so quickly, and had to have been going on for a few minutes before we had heard about it and gotten a cameraman down there. Let's watch some of the replays.
*The shot shows off some of the harder hit moves, like with the fire extinguisher and the Mandible Claw...*
Heenan: Well, the ring is ready for the next match. The rest of the place isn't in as great a shape. So what say we bring out our next wrestlers? Take it, Penzer!
Penzer: Thank you, Bobby.... ladies and gentlemen, the next match is scheduled for one fall... 3 cruiserweights will be facing off to see who will be the GCWA Cruiserweight Champion! *cheers* First, the challengers... coming down the aisle... he stands 6'1", and weighs 224 lbs... known for his high-flying skills, as well as his recent winning streak which got him here.... the Rocker.. Marty Jannetty!
*Jannetty comes down to his rock theme, getting the fans psyched... he heads into the ring, taking off his shirt...*
Tenay: Jannetty has gone from being the "jobber" of the Cruiserweights to one of the top contenders within the past few weeks, getting as far as taking down the former champion, Darkstarr. Now he's got to defeat two cruiserweight champs in one outing. Still, if anyone deserves it, it's the Rocker.
Heenan: I guess, Mike. I don't know, I've been following this guy for many years now. He had something with Shawn Michaels, which he threw away. Ever since then, he's never been able to pull off the big wins. If he does it tonight, then he'll be proving a lot of people, including me, wrong. But I don't see him having the ability to win it all.
JR: Words from the Weasal's mouth. A treasure, to be sure.
Penzer: Coming to the ring... weighing 140 lbs and standing 5'5"... a former Cruiserweight Champ, and a member of the Soldierz of Style... LilPun!
*LilPun comes to the ring with some new threads on, getting the audience to cheer as he signals an SOS... he enters the ring, looking at Jannetty... the two continue to stare at each other for a second, sizing each other up...*
Heenan: Now LilPun has what it takes. He's proven it before, becoming the champ. This kid can fly, no doubt about it. The problem is, can he overcome his hatred of Shorty to come out the winner of this one?
Penzer: The third competitor... making his way to the ring... weighing 110 lbs, and standing 5'3" 'tall'... the most diminutive member of the Ruff Ryders... the Cruiserweight Champion of the World... Shorty!
*The champion comes out to a chorus of boos... he looks a little nervous, but still heads into the ring... both Jannetty and LilPun are leaning in their corners, waiting... Shorty gets in and lifts the title over his head, then hands it to the attendant... he points at the two wrestlers, then points at himself, saying he's the champ...*
Tenay: Shorty has been holding onto that title for dear life, ever since he became the champ. He's dodged LilPun's requests for a match, then left the arena before he would have to face Marty Jannetty, which prompted the signing of this match. Still, for all his quirks, remember: Shorty won the title, which shows he has the skills.
*The bell rings...*
Tenay: LilPun steps towards Shorty and waves him on. Shorty looks over at Jannetty, who's still waiting in the corner. I guess Jannetty's going to give LilPun a few minutes solo with Shorty. That's a wise maneuver, making them tire each other out while he stays fresh. But I can't see Jannetty staying on the sidelines long.
JR: LilPun and Shorty lock up, with LilPun actually having the height advantage. Jannetty looks like a giant in there! Heh. After a few tugs back and forth, LilPun shoves Shorty back. Shorty immediately takes a couple of steps and leaps, going for a cross body splash, but LilPun ducks, allowing Shorty to roll over him. Shorty jumps back to his feet and comes in, throwing out both feet in an effort to take LilPun down. Once again, LilPun dodges, as Shorty hits the ground. LilPun smiles and comes in, but Shorty surprises him, wrapping both legs around him and rolling him up! That only gets a 1 count, though. It's obvious that Shorty's main goal is to get out of this with the title still around his waist!
Heenan: LilPun and Shorty quickly get back to their feet, looking at each other. Shorty darts in, grabbing LilPun's leg and landing a Dragon Screw Legdrop, snapping LilPun's leg, and thus, his whole body, over him! What a great manevuer! LilPun's clutching his knee, as Shorty gets up. Jannetty's still watching, letting the two fight. He looks pretty antsy, though. He keeps looking at the clock. Shorty continues the attack, grabbing an Ankle Lock. LilPun immediately starts scrambling for the ropes, reaching them before Shorty can pull him back.
Tenay: Shorty releases the hold, then charges at Jannetty!! But Jannetty's waiting, rolling out of the way, then catching Shorty as he hops back out of the corner, lifting him in a partial gorilla press before dropping him with a DVD! Shorty's down! Jannetty says something to him, then picks him up again and whips him into the ropes, catching him with a clothesline. LilPun's pulling himself back to his feet, and Jannetty comes over and attacks, lifting him and getting a Belly-To-Back! I guess the truce is over!
JR: If there ever was one, Mike. Jannetty's looking pretty strong in there against the two smaller wrestlers! Jannetty lifts LilPun back to his feet, then gives him a Snap Suplex, well-executed! He goes for the pin... 1... Shorty's back up, driving an elbow into Jannetty's back! Shorty pulls the Rocker up, then does a standing Hurricanrana! Jannetty's down now! Shorty then goes after LilPun, who was trying to get up, and catches him with a sliding tackle, driving his legs out of under him. Shorty picks LilPun up and positions him, then throws him over his back. But LilPun landed on his feet, behind him! He grabs Shorty around the waist drops him backwards, hitting his head on the mat!
Heenan: Now Jannetty's back up, and I mean up! He's climbing the turnbuckle, even as LilPun gets back to his feet. LilPun doesn't see him, instead lifting up Shorty and slamming him back down. Jannetty leaps, but LilPun dodges out of the way, causing Jannetty to land on Shorty's knees! Both wrestlers apparently DID see him coming! Jannetty's clutching his ribcage, while LilPun grabs hold of Shorty again. But the youth champ twists around LilPun, getting a half nelson! LilPun snaps his elbow back, catching Shorty in the mask, then runs up the turnbuckle and hits a Tornado DDT! He's going for the cover! 1... 2... NO! Shorty kicks out!
JR: This could go on all night! LilPun gets up slowly, looking slightly frustrated... and gets met by a flying Jannetty, who shoulderblocks him out of the ring!! LilPun's on the ground in a bad position! Jannetty, meanwhile, throws Shorty into the ropes and throws him way overhead, sending him outside the ring as well! Shorty made the best of a bad situation, though, landing right on LilPun, who took the worst of it! Shorty's on his feet, but here comes Jannetty! No, Shorty moved, and Jannetty ate the outside mat!!
Tenay: Those suicidal moves can decide a match, one way or another! Shorty's the only one standing now! He grabs Jannetty and rolls him into the ring, then grabs LilPun and whips him into the stairs! He then enters the ring via the turnbuckle, climbing up it. He's at the top, with Jannetty below him! Could this be the Shooting Star Press? He's won with it before! No, LilPun reaches out and hits the ropes, leaning on them for support, which causes Shorty to do a version of the Splits! Shorty's hurt for sure now!
Heenan: Uh-oh! Look who just came out of the back! It's Konnan and Rey Mysterio Jr, Shorty's biggest supporters! The No-Limit Soldiers are on their way to the ring! LilPun doesn't see them. He's climbing up the turnbuckle, slugging Shorty back. Oh, but Jannetty does! He's flying once again over the ropes, crashing into both individuals! What a move! He just took two guys down with that one! But it's going to cost him, 'cause LilPun just used the UG Maneuver!! Shorty's out cold! LilPun makes the cover... 1... 2... 3!!!
JR: LilPun is now the 2-time Cruiserweight Champion!! What a great win for this young man! He's returned to the top! He looks happier than I've ever seen him, guys! Mysterio and Konnan are up. They're in the ring, looking pretty upset. They each help Shorty up, who doesn't look so hot. Neither does Marty Jannetty! He's still down on the outside of the ring!
Tenay: LilPun just got the title. He's raising it above his head as the fans cheer. Oh, he just noticed Jannetty. He's heading outside the ring, even as the Ruff Ryders leave. Did they take an extra shot at him while LilPun won, or did Jannetty land wrong? He did take a bad spill earlier in the match.
JR: I'm not sure, Mike. He's moving, though. He's pulling himself up slowly. LilPun's checking on him, showing some good sportsmanship. And here comes Animal Thug, the leader of the Wolfpac! He grabs one of Jannetty's arms. Jannetty just shook him and LilPun off, though! He's walking away from both of them, shaking his head. I think his lip's bleeding, but he doesn't look too bad. Thug's following after him, while LilPun shrugs and puts the title around his waist.
Heenan: It's hard to tell what Jannetty's feeling right now. His winning streak is over, and he might be injured. It's hard to tell. I do know that he made a mistake in attacking the Ruff Ryders. Yes, he kept them from interfering in the match, but it also cost him the win.
Tenay: Well, any way you look at it, LilPun is the new champion. It's almost time for the third hour of the Pay-Per-View, so we're going to take another short break. We've still got three more titles on the line, in three of the biggest matches in this Fed's history, so don't give up yet! Stick around!
*Replays of the cruiserweight title match are shown, including the UG Maneuver... the screen fades out...*